This morning, when I punched into work, I saw a sign on the bulletin board that said "Please wear a Patriotic shirt for Friday, July 4" and then blah blah blah. I found it kind of amusing on many levels: how can a shirt be patriotic? Do they mean wear a New England Patriots shirt? How patriotic is patriotic? Can a shirt be TOO patriotic? Is the patriotism null and void or strengthened if it's made in China? Most importantly: do I even have a patriotic shirt?
Of course, after the stomach turning rush of anxiety and fear of maybe not having a patriotic shirt to wear on Friday died down, I came to the realization that the only way a shirt can be patriotic is if the person wearing it wishes to stand for the ideals of the country, and not for some crass desire to be a part of the freedom club or the patriot platoon. So, my patriotic shirt could have a flag on it, it could not. It could have a dragon, Spider-Man, a clever phrase, nothing at all, or I could be wearing nothing at all. When I told this to my co-workers though, they got all fidgety and said, "but you're supposed to wear red, white, and blue", before calling Homeland Security on me. Fortunately, they didn't discover my real name of Abdul, otherwise I wouldn't be here to write this inanity, which is rendered moot by the fact that I have the fourth off anyway, but I found this whole thing kind of amusing. If you did too, great, if not, swell, and if you want to tell me it was stupid, that's your patriotic duty to do so, but fuck you anyway.
Cheers, enjoy the weekend however you fit, and behold my cleverly staged kaiju battle:
Of course, after the stomach turning rush of anxiety and fear of maybe not having a patriotic shirt to wear on Friday died down, I came to the realization that the only way a shirt can be patriotic is if the person wearing it wishes to stand for the ideals of the country, and not for some crass desire to be a part of the freedom club or the patriot platoon. So, my patriotic shirt could have a flag on it, it could not. It could have a dragon, Spider-Man, a clever phrase, nothing at all, or I could be wearing nothing at all. When I told this to my co-workers though, they got all fidgety and said, "but you're supposed to wear red, white, and blue", before calling Homeland Security on me. Fortunately, they didn't discover my real name of Abdul, otherwise I wouldn't be here to write this inanity, which is rendered moot by the fact that I have the fourth off anyway, but I found this whole thing kind of amusing. If you did too, great, if not, swell, and if you want to tell me it was stupid, that's your patriotic duty to do so, but fuck you anyway.
Cheers, enjoy the weekend however you fit, and behold my cleverly staged kaiju battle:
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Have a great 4th. I'm going on vacation and spending my economic stimulus check in another country.