Monday Sep 06, 2004

0
So...

I must purify.

I must learn to be selfless. I must learn to love purely, selflessly, completely without desire.

I truly love one person in the world in this way, and it nearly destroyed me arriving at it. There must be an easier way to reach this level, because I'm simply not strong enough to go through that again.

I must purify my heart and love without myself.

It frightens me.

I'm not even sure what it means, or how I'll know if I'm there. I think it means I want nothing from you, not even acknowledgement. I think it means I'll never care the answer to the question "Do you love me?" I think it means the question never even crosses my mind.




No hope, no harm
Just another false alarm.
VIEW 11 of 11 COMMENTS
mistakesmade:
My first day is actually tomorrow. I have only have classes Tues and Thurs. this semester. I'm pretty excited, but also kind of apprehensive.... we'll see how it goes tomorrow though biggrin

kiss
MM
mercie:
My dear, I think you think way too much. I used to do that... I even succumb to the self-analysis once in awhile as well, but not nearly as much as before. I've learned to not burden myself with wondering where I will be in life after this weekend. Thins that need forethought get forethought, but beyond that, the day to day life and activities, I just go with it. Don't hurt yourself trying to achieve this level you are talking about... maybe it just needs to happen.

I will definitely come up there as soon as time and money allow. My bankruptcy is hurting me a lot, so it may not be for awhile unless this biatch gets a free ride while in town. But I will, I will, if for nothing else to see you again, cutie! haha kiss

More Blogs