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Denbigh

Member Since 2006

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Thursday Jan 24, 2008

Jan 24, 2008
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Uncle Buck is one of the best films ever made, and its all down to one man. The late John Candy. Sure the other members of the crew probably had something to do with its sucess but without Mr Candy it would of been shit.

It might seem daft but the lack of someone like John Candy worries me because there is no one like him working in cinema. Same goes for Clint Eastwood, were is his replacement within the up and coming actors? In fairness Clint hasnt been a badass for a while now, but theres no one to claim that crown. Same with Bruce Willis.

There are rumours that Shia Labeouf is going to carry on from Harrison Ford as a substitute Indiana Jones. I like Shia, but thats like considering me as a replacement for Angelina Jolie.

It seems a sad state of affairs when the aging Stallone is the only person that can make a balls to the wall action pic (from what I've heard "Rambo" is fucking mental violent).

Don't get me wrong there are some blinding actors out there, but there always have been. What we seem short of are screen personalities. People like Arnie, who just play Arnie but the force of their presence is enough. The action heroes are leaving the multiplexes.

Now our action heroes are superheroes, instead of forces of nature that can kill an island of bad guys with just a pistol. Or messed up dudes like Martin Riggs. Where are are all the ordinary guys in a bad situation like John McClane?

Action movies now have to come with sci-fi nonsense attached like the "The Matrix", so we buy that Keanu Reeves can kick ass. Arnie didnt need martial arts to fool you into thinking he could break you in two. Why can't we just have a straight up action movie?

I know what your about to say. "What about the Jason Bourne movies Geoff?" You'd be making a good point to because they rock. However they lack a prerequisite of a great action film, a bad guy. A bunch of suits in a office playing with computers are not good bad guys. At no point are they a threat to the hero, or ever actually evil. Bad guys need to be EVIL BASTARDS that will kill puppies if it means they get what they want.

The Bourne movies have another problem as well, stupidly complex plots. An action movie has this plot:

Good guy + Bad Guy + Explosions - Brains = Happy Geoff

Since there no action heroes anymore the writers need to explain why the hero can kick ass. Rubbish.

The only set of movies that do this are Bond films, and even they are trying to lean into realistic action. Realistic action? Seriously? Why bother. If I wanted to see things that could really happen I'd sit and watch the outside world not movies.

Here's the real kicker. I watched the Mythbusters Bond Special a few nights ago. They started off by seeing if you can explode a gas cannister with a 9mm bullet. Of course you can't so then they went on to see how much force it would take to blow it up. Eventually the solution was to strap explosives to it. I think thats called giving the audience what they want, we couldn't give a stuff about the science. We just want to see shit explode.

Anyway in conclusion to this meandering and probably complete nonsense rant, "Commando" is better than ever other action film ever made and if you disagree you probably don't have any balls and like Richard Curtis movies.



You might not know this but "Commando" is actually a documentary. As was "Kindergarten Cop".

Anyway I tire of typing drivel, if you've read through that lot I've got to question why.

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