watch_it_burn

My Grandparents are visiting at the minute, which is very nice and such. Unfortunatly it means soap operas at meal times. Whoever wrote Genesis must have missed the part were God punished us not just with death but with Eastenders and the like. The attraction to these shows confuses me, I didnt know amateur theatre was so popular it could be broadcast in a prime time slot. It must also take real skill to construct plots around everyday occurance and then thoroughly wring any drama from them.

Then we get to the acting. There is none. The only time the actors intonations change is when they start shouting slightly louder than they were before.

My pain watching the show is deep. But spare a thought for the editors. They might have to watch the same thing for hours. Endless cutting from a shot to a reverse shot and repeat, perhaps an establishing shot at the beginning of the scene. I feel for them I really do.

My sisters boyfriend and I reckon soaps are the reason people are so fucking miserable all the time. Its time to remove them and we have the ideal replacement.

With soap opera out of the way I can move on to ridding the world of HeartBeat, replacing all hospital drama's with "House", stealing "Only Fools and Horses" form the BBC vaults and only returning it if they stop endlessly repeating it. Then we'll never have to suffer Delboy falling through that bar again.

Then to top all that I will destroy every show that involves telling you how to decorate or sell your home. The ones about dodgy builders are safe, only cos cowboy brick jockeys are funny.

I have eight more days on holiday, reckon I can get most of that done.