walkingman

Since the death of my nephew several weeks I have been making more regular visits to the homes of my parents and siblings. I have become the grief counselor for my family and the one who handles the things that need to be done. How I hate my job some days. Somehow they think because I am a lawyer that I have experience in these kinds of things. There is no connection between the type of law that I practice and the kind of things I am being called upon to do for the family. Most of them have nothing to do with the practice of the law but since I am the lawyer I get the job. One of my siblings one night during a grieving session asked me to help him with his daughter. It seems she has been diagnosed with a psychological condition and has been prescribed medication. However while she is under his health insurance and he pays for her prescriptions, he is not sure if she is taking her medications. She is also a cutter and after her cousins death has been talking more and more about suicide. I had suspected that she suffered from depression but did not know about the cutting. I texted her that night and asked her if I could see her the next day. We met for coffee and I told her that her dad told me some of what was going on. She was guarded and told me that her dad was full of bullshit. I told her that I did not care about what was going on between my brother and her. I told her that I loved her and did not want to lose her. I said that I was still feeling the loss of my nephew and her cousin and really could not go through it again. I looked at her through teary eyes and said that I was there because I cared for her and just wanted to help. I reached out to hug her and we both just cried. She told me that when Joe died that she felt he finally found peace and that she wanted that peace as well. They had often talked about being lost and looking for some kind of peace. She said she knew he had found peace and was no longer lost and she craved that kind of peace as well. I told her that she must realize that while he might have found peace that he had left us all feeling lost and definitely not as peace. I told her that we all loved her and wanted to help her if she would accept it. She admitted to me that she is having her prescriptions filled but is not taking her medications. She knows that her condition is getting worse as she can feel the depression taking over her thoughts. She agreed to certain measures so I could get involved in overseeing her medical care. We are going to go slow. I was so clueless about things that were going on at family gatherings before and after the funeral. My wife has been so understanding and so helpful. She has been there for me and has allowed me to vent without saying anything. Here I thought I was so intelligent and so aware of things around me and yet I have been proved so wrong. Please forgive me if I miss the obvious. Please help educate and inform me if you have experience. I need to learn more and look forward to whatever insight you can provide me. Thanks.