walden_

So, I'm feeling lonely.


This sucks. Sucks so bad.. I've been dating a lot recently, and while a few overlap, it's mostly a few dates, and then I tell them it's over. I'm not connecting with anyone! I'm new to this dating thing.. this is the first year I've really done it.
Previously, I've been in a commited longterm relationship, since I was 15.

I just.. haven't found anyone I'm passionate about.. anyone that cares about me as a person and wants to talk about passion, big issues, and the little things in my life. I've spent so much time listening to damn stories men tell in attempts to entertain.. and I'm so giving, that I smile, I ask engaging questions, I give information about myself.. and it continues. They don't reciprocate, and I just feel hurt.

I want to be held. I want warmth, tenderness.. I want attraction.. I want spontaneous conversations and giddiness, and seriousness. Humor..

I don't even feel inspired at this time.. I feel ache.

Why can't I just be satisfied?