vsanthos

I feel really lonely lately. I've felt this way before, and it sucks. I just kinda feel like no one really wants to be around me or talk to me sometimes. I can have someone spend all day with me and tell me it was a lot of fun, and I still feel alone. It's a winter problem I guess. My dating life is non-existant, I want to just push the few women who are interested in me away for some reason. Mostly, they just are different and I'm scared of being hurt, a lot. I sometimes also feel like I'm trying to carry relationships/friendships myself, but I think that's more my personal paranoias than any reality. I've had friends my entire life who just wanted to walk all over me. I overanalyze everything and it drives me bonkers, I don't sleep enough, it makes me edgy and the lack of sun makes me depressed... put the three together and you get the fun of winter for me! Hopefully I can get my sleep under control, which will help me be sane and hopefully less of an emotional basket case.

It also doesn't help that I started playing WoW again and have spend waaaaaaaaaaay too much time playing it, secluding myself further and making me feel the good old fried brain feelings. In fact one of my best friends got angry over the game tonight which I assume has a lot to do with my restlessness, loneliness and anger.

Oh well, I pray things get better soon. I really don't want to go through another winter like last year's where I was constantly in a turmoil because I let some dumb bitch fuck with my emotions for six months.