I wanted to talk about social behaviors. How people act and what they expect from others. For a lot of people it is their natural instinct to reach out to other people. They do it often without effort or thought. And because its so effortless for them they think its like that for everyone. They might wonder why some people dont respond back or why they have communication issues. They may take it personally because of their perspective on social behaviors and protocols. What they expect is a similar reflection to what they put out. However for those of us who have communication issues or social anxieties its not so simple. Sometimes years of trauma can change how a person reacts to others, their desire to reach out to others and the amount of effort it takes to due so. When a person can no longer trust other humans due to repeated life lessons they isolate out of instinct. Being alone is easier. Sometimes they want to reach out to others but the effort is so much greater to due so, as is the risk and so they fall short.
When I was younger I used to wonder why some people never responded back to me. The first thought is always that they just dont want to talk to me. But in reality it was more than likely personal for them. Later in life my perspective changed. I realized that just like how I am now, more than likely those people back in the day just had personal issues going on that had nothing to do with anyone else. I have social anxieties that I battle. I have periods where I want to be social and can't. Other times when I spend long amounts of time alone and still dont want to be around others. Nobody tells you who to be or what to do when your alone. Not that I'm an obedient sort but its easier to be alone then constantly having to defend the person you are and the things you love. This is why I'm not in a relationship and won't be in the foreseeable future.
People who have been through trauma build defense mechanisms to survive. These are great until you are trying interact with the world around you. Anyway my point is that you never know what someone has been through or who they are. Don't take it personal if someone doesnt talk to you. Be grateful when they do. Not everything is about us. Understanding that everyone has different perspectives due to the life they have lived is so important. Be patient with others and don't have expectations of them when they didn't ask you to. Exceptions exist such as romantic relationships because you agree to share time and life decisions with someone who has a set of expectations. Emplyer and employee relationships are different but again there are expectations of how to act and how to be treated. Friendships have minimal expectations, such as I expect you not to treat me like shit. But as far as what we should all expect from each other, nothing but a bit of common decency.
