1. I have a new baby brother.
2. Have to go see my dad for the first time in a year and a half.
3. I'm learning this twitter thing though people are probably sick of my twitters and questions about it.
4. Nothing like a baby to bring a family together... kind of.
5. Jackson is his name.
6. I just got a phone call from my dad 2 seconds ago. First phone call in a year.
7. He was telling me how much they would like it if I came.
8. I told him my sister convinced me to come.
9. I didn't want him thinking I was there for him.
10. I'm going to wish my brother a happy birthday and pray that he doesn't turn out as fucked up as the rest of us.
11. My dad said he is cute. But I bet he looks like an alien. All babies do. I must be honest and say that I myself looked like an alien at first too.
12. I'm starting to think my dad had this baby to spite me and make me come see him. Kidding of course.
13. I have no doubt I will love the baby. I just doubt that I will like the chick Luann. Never met her and wasn't planning on it. It wont change things between my dad and I ether.
14. So all in all this is a happy and frustrating day all in one.
15. I know I'm being a brat but if you met my dad you would consider me an angel for even going. hehe.
16. This is the man who kicked me down a hill when I was 15 and carrying firewood while we were camping. And the reason why we were camping was because he was still signing for his new house so he was living on the family yacht he got in the separation. That was the last time I stayed with him. I sliced my foot open the following week at my moms and faked the fact that it was bad conditions on a yacht for a cut.
17. He's gotten a little more decent with old age (41). Quit drinking, stopped being violent, treats me well. At the same time he broke down on a trip to Disney land last year just the two of us and I couldn't handle all of his "I am so misunderstood" Victim baggage so I stopped talking to him. He of all people didn't deserve my sympathy especially given he never really showed me any when he was being violent toward me growing up. It may be harsh but its true and I cannot help the way i feel.
18. Lately though I've been thinking about the rare minuets when he's been decent to me and wondering if I should talk to him again. But every time I do it seems that he just does something else to infuriate me.
19. So I am going for the baby. (Jackson)
20. Hopefully I won't smack my dad. (That would be a first but a long time coming)... I would never really do that.
21. Is it bad that I forgot his new chick was pregnant in the first place.
Song of the Day: The World I Know By Collective Soul
2. Have to go see my dad for the first time in a year and a half.
3. I'm learning this twitter thing though people are probably sick of my twitters and questions about it.
4. Nothing like a baby to bring a family together... kind of.
5. Jackson is his name.
6. I just got a phone call from my dad 2 seconds ago. First phone call in a year.
7. He was telling me how much they would like it if I came.
8. I told him my sister convinced me to come.
9. I didn't want him thinking I was there for him.
10. I'm going to wish my brother a happy birthday and pray that he doesn't turn out as fucked up as the rest of us.
11. My dad said he is cute. But I bet he looks like an alien. All babies do. I must be honest and say that I myself looked like an alien at first too.
12. I'm starting to think my dad had this baby to spite me and make me come see him. Kidding of course.
13. I have no doubt I will love the baby. I just doubt that I will like the chick Luann. Never met her and wasn't planning on it. It wont change things between my dad and I ether.
14. So all in all this is a happy and frustrating day all in one.
15. I know I'm being a brat but if you met my dad you would consider me an angel for even going. hehe.
16. This is the man who kicked me down a hill when I was 15 and carrying firewood while we were camping. And the reason why we were camping was because he was still signing for his new house so he was living on the family yacht he got in the separation. That was the last time I stayed with him. I sliced my foot open the following week at my moms and faked the fact that it was bad conditions on a yacht for a cut.
17. He's gotten a little more decent with old age (41). Quit drinking, stopped being violent, treats me well. At the same time he broke down on a trip to Disney land last year just the two of us and I couldn't handle all of his "I am so misunderstood" Victim baggage so I stopped talking to him. He of all people didn't deserve my sympathy especially given he never really showed me any when he was being violent toward me growing up. It may be harsh but its true and I cannot help the way i feel.
18. Lately though I've been thinking about the rare minuets when he's been decent to me and wondering if I should talk to him again. But every time I do it seems that he just does something else to infuriate me.
19. So I am going for the baby. (Jackson)
20. Hopefully I won't smack my dad. (That would be a first but a long time coming)... I would never really do that.
21. Is it bad that I forgot his new chick was pregnant in the first place.
Song of the Day: The World I Know By Collective Soul
VIEW 14 of 14 COMMENTS
As a child that was in a similar situation to this young Jackson, I must say it was pretty awesome having two sisters 20+ years older than I am, even though I didn't see them all that often growing up (only every 2-3 years). When I did see them, they'd tell me secrets I wasn't suppose to know and make me feel respected in an environment where I most often felt invisible with an overly busy mother and an all but absent father. Definitely some of my fondest childhood memories and I suspect more influential than I really understand.