vitriolicunt

There will be two entries.

First, you and Ant are the greatest - thank you so much for everything. I feel like I'm starting to get to know you both a bit aside from the video stuff and as you say it is cool to find 'nice' people (with whips and Tommy Guns etc) to hang out with. We shall see what the future holds.

I'm excited about the vid, my DV tape (which I need to get to The Boy) hs some great stuff itself so Ant's should be most excellent.

Thank you.
Thank you.Thank you.Thank you.
Thank you.

HKS

She keeps looking at me in the reflection of the train window, thinking I'm not onto that old Chestnut. I even go so far as to stare straight into her eyes, but her blue smoke and mirrors trick seemes to only work on one direction. Hers. She actually thinks I'm looking out the window as the midlands and their green, lamb-filled fields fly past.

I turn back to my magazine and flick to a page that has singles ads and open it face up on the little train table, reading intently. If this isn't a signal, nothing is. I like this game of cat and mouse. I sometimes play it on the tube.

One time on the way to meet Igor in Mile End one of these encounters culminated in her basically standing close to me and rubbing her arse agains my thigh and crotch. We never made eye contact. After two stations she bolted off the train and all the way up the stairs at Whiechapel and I couldn't get the image of a doe fleeing into the forest from my mind. That was fun.

Sometimes it goes nowhere at all, the fear of the new or the thrill of the chase beaten down by the what if's of modern life and the culture of not speaking to strangers, let alone neighbours.

Escalators as well -- the long stare, the eye contact, the smile. Fun, but seldom works.

Nicky says my game is outrageous and I am a flirt. I think it's like a social experiment. Observing human psychology. Seeking how strong is the desire for contact and intimacy - and can it overcome all the social and personal fears - and why - and who does and who doesn't.

Then again, sometimes they are in fact just looking out the window.