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virgin

Valencia, California

Member Since 2005

Followers 25 Following 4

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Monday Nov 14, 2005

Nov 14, 2005
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So I'm single again.

Yeah, Jon broke up with me a bit earlier on this morning. I ran into him and I asked him how he was and he said, "Oh, good, yeah, I'm sorry but I can't go out with you anymore, I'm too connected with you and I know you too well and it feels like I'm dating my cousin or something." I kind of knew I had it coming so I just weekly smiled and said, "Ok." While I was upset and wanted to beg for another chance, there's no point to that. Then he just ran off.

Oh, and he was smiling too when he said it. He was with his friend Landin when I ran into him and he ran back to hang with him after he broke up with me. Maybe... maybe I just embarased him. Maybe it was all a show for his friends. Maybe?

I feel so lost and confused though, really. We both have MySpaces, right, and he couldn't change his status to "In a Relationship". Well he was able to change it last night, and so he did, and he messaged me and my good friend Ari about how he was finally able to change it and how he was all excited.

That's super ironic though, because I got his message this morning before I left, and I said, "Hah, well good, now all those bitches know you're taken." And... he broke up with me a few hours later. Oh boy, that's irony at its worst.

Oh well, now I'm trying to settle on theories. Is he just scared of commitment, or worse, sex, and when he realised that's where this was going, he just backed out? Or did I do something or say something that he didn't particularly care for? Or perhaps a cute girl asked him out a little earlier than that and she was more worth it than me?

Worst of all, though, I really want him back right now. I want to beg and plead for another chance and promise to be better. I want to drop to my knees and scream about how I could prove how I'll be worth it this time. But... I don't want to do that. That would go against the morals and principles that have put so much time and effort into shaping me, Miss Samm, into the person that I am today. I want to so bad though.

It's not even him I'll really miss though. It's the hugging, and the kissing, and the making out, and the groping, ...and the phone sex. Hahah. Maybe he'd go for a friends with benefits thing, yeah?

Oh well, sure it hurts, and sure Ill cry, and hey, there might even be days that I wish I could die. But Ill be ok, Ill always be ok. He wasnt that great of a fuck anyways! So sure, Ill miss him, but not enough to be sad to see him go.

But I am sad. I'm... sadd.

-Samm whatever

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