virally_yours

Its amazing.... the power of words, put together in the right order even just a few can make your whole world come crashing down.

Im not a writer in the least, Im not even smart
But I wanted to try to write something, because I think it will help me mentally.
So here goes nothing..

I want to start with Life
I just dont understand it, everytime I find a solitary moment of happiness, its stripped from me in the blink of an eye.
I stare at the ceiling aimlessly at night, all I can think about is your face, that smile , and your eyes.
In that moment I feel at home, I feel at peace, and for once in my life I feel a love that is realBut I forgot one thing.. the fact that nothing in my life will ever fall into place.
I forgot that god if their be one, hates me in all aspects of my denial of him.
I would love to look myself in the eyes and say I told you so because the signs are always there.
The sooner I accept a life alone , the better I would be.
Just think
No stress
No shot nerves
No more tears
No more pain
No heartbreak
It truly would be a great world, if only I could love myself that might be an option.
So if someone can answer this question.. please let me know.
I find it peculiar.....how can it hurt so bad, while love is only in the mind?
Why is that?
Oh well Im done ranting , its just stupid nonsense at this point.