violethaze

i can't believe i'm still awake.

i'm trying to find something nice to wear for someone that passed away on Tuesday, who i very much considered a wonderful woman and friend. I know she can't see me anymore, but I still want to look my best, at least look like i'm holding it together. she is the aunt of someone who is very special to me.

she was not well, and she was elderly, but i didn't think she was old, 76. (i have a grand-uncle that's 91 and is still rockin' as my dentist). she had been going for a long time, and i'm glad she's not suffering anymore. i unfortunately didn't get to know her for very long. about only 3 1/2 years. she was very generous and thoughtful. she played a lot of card games that i didn't understand, but sitting next to her and watching was always fun because she was so good at them. And i was very excited to go see her always.

i was able to see her the night before she passed. i made plans with her that next time i saw her, we were going to have a girls day. I'd style her hair and make her nephew paint her toe nails. Before we (her nephew and i) left i asked if i could pray with her so we did. i told her i loved her before we parted. i was so sure i'd see her next week for our date. she was gone 6 hours later. stopped breathing while she slept. and now i'm heartbroken.

thank you dear lady for having the opportunity to know you. i'll see you again someday....