violet

oooh i had a good time last night.
nudge nudge wink wink.

I keep having all these fucked up dreams though, and my jaw won't stop popping because all i do is grind my teeth all night.

I was driving down the street today, listening to music in my car, on the highway, about 9:30pm...and i just felt bliss, y'know that feeling when you feel like you are coming into your own, and just everything is lovely and sweet, and your just happy how the wind feels on you and your singing your heart out, completely out of tune, yet somehow you kind of like the sound of your own voice the same way that your own farts smell good too?

I feel like i'm on cloud nine but for no other reason of that i am

1.) self employeed and fukcing loooooving it.

2.) i like to hump legs

3.) the coffee place I go to, stumptown, makes fucking fantastic coffee, I do business there meeting with clients, reworking projects, designing...all amongst hot boys everywhere! And its not even like i want to talk to them, they are just fantastic eye candy...and there are different boys every day... its like a new pastry specials everyday but with penises and a lot less carbs.

4.) spending all day working for myself really feels cool, and i don't even have to get naked! I love really utilizing my skills y'know, its like everything i learned in school is being used and applied to a million different things

5.) This is the weirdest thing, even on the occassional cry I have, i still feel happy. It's weird not being sad... or feeling inadequate...

Where out thou depression? I am starting to miss you and your heartfelt cries of pain... ok maybe not, but i do feel kind of weird not having you around.

Oh and somehow i managed this week to tell off every single one of my ex's except for cupcake and brenty. Which is good because at least those two were post bad ex's so maybe my taste in men has changed for the better,

And i just feel this numb happy feeling and its not attributed to anyone but me. I am a completely selfish wench with loins of fury... i really enjoy pissing people off this week, something i always found to be hard to do in the past. Y'know stirring up shit... about everything... all the time.

time for bedtime with the boyfriend that plugs in the wall...