violencejack

I feel like there is this soft place at the heart of me.
I present myself as gruff, unshaven, selfish, whatever is necessary to turn people off, to make them leave me alone. I'm too soft in the center, too easy to hurt. I don't want them in.
I need someone in, though. It's far too lonely by myself. I need someone to love. I need someone to love me.
Love is like sunshine to a garden, warm and energizing and lifegiving. I'm kinda withered inside, kinda dry and dark, like a cellar.
A while back I decided that I don't need a girlfriend. In truth, I don't; I can and do live without one. I wanted one very badly, but that desire was hurting me. So, I turned the desire down, like a flame on a stove, stuck it on low on the back burner.
I wonder, will it happen? Patience is not my virtue.

The moon is so beautiful tonight. She is silver and gold and almost full, calling to me from the sky like a lover calling me home. God I miss that feeling.

I am a candle in a window. My light will lead you home.