vinyle

It's Tuesday. Tuesday always makes me think of the bar I would like have. The bar would have a great jukebox and Tuesday would be 2 for 2 tacos and beer. In my bar you could slow dance to some bluesy old music while loosely holding a cold beer in your hand before stumbling into a booth for a sloppy kiss, or maybe you would like to listen to some drop kick murphy's, raise a pint glass and get a little rowdy, or come in wearing a cowboy hat belting out classic rock and remembering what it felt like to ride in the back seat of your parents car on a summer day to the beach.

I'm feeling a little better about things with the guy since my last post. I need to accept certain things or move on most likely. We have different definitions of going out. I have a young son and much smaller circle of friends, so I am homebound more. He has to fit the boy and I into a full schedule of work, band practice, shows, golf and hanging out with an ever growing cast of friends. I don't want to feel like I'm being schedule in. I want someone to say on a sunny Saturday morning "Hey, lets take kayaks down to the water and bring a picnic, or let's go the zoo or that new art exhibit you wanted to see. Let's take the boy fishing" We talk a lot about becoming a family. His family was much different than mine, which is often the case with relationships. Am I the only person who wants their SO to make time for them - who doesn't understand the difference between hanging out with work friend and band practice and golf time and how all of them in 1 week do not constitute hanging out all the time? So I've got some decisions to make. It's not a question of love I guess, but priority. I want to feel important to him and I don't. I cannot be in a relationship and be alone at the same time.

So it's my birthday in a little less than a week. I am getting old. Don't know what is going to happen this weekend, but I hope it is something fun. So far the guy has back to back shows, hanging out in Baltimore one night don't know what is happening the next. I hope that I am not getting another set of golfclubs that I will never use. That would be the best ever. I will keep you posted. Tacos and beer all around.