vim

we waltzed in delirious circles, across the deck overlooking the ocean...her soft hair against my face...her eyes to the sky, waching it all spin by...smiling as the cool, salted air kissed her cheeks...and carried our laughter out to sea......i can't wait 'til she can say "i love you too daddy"

Don't you hate it, when you're fully expected to perform an entire nights worth of ninjatic cunnilingus and porn star sex, with a gorgeous set of Norwegian foreign exchange students who happen to be sisters, when all you really want to do is read a little Dostoevsky and hit the sack??

woe is me.

so what if i give my nipps the ol' pinch n' tug so they'll poke out of my tight shirt as i walk over to the gym.....does that make me a bad person?!?!?!





ummm....did i just say that out loud?

...

"oh...my...god...this hot tub is WAY too hot for naked little me....vimmy baby will you spray me down with the hose please?"


i shit you not...i get that ALL the time.

ummm....did you know that if you eat nothing but vanilla yogurt and black beans over a 24 hour period, your dook will look just like chocolate chip cookie dough?.....now if you're extra special nice....i might just bake you up some pookies!!

living with mom and dad while the house gets a jenny jones makeover has been interesting to say the least....i feel like i'm 24...ummm...i mean 10 again.

7oz Tsar Nicoulai California Estate Osetra Caviar...$357
2 bttl. '93 Dom Perignon Rose...$492
1 bttl. 3 Vodka...$24
1 Portuguese Rose Marble indoor jacuzzi...$13000
4 gorgeous sets of huge, pink, veiny boobies, poppin outta tiny Wicked Weasel bikinis....fucking priceless.


here's to happy Fridays...and to all of you.