THOUSAND PALMS, CA
id like to share a recent letter i wrote and the reply that i just received
Dear Satan,
I would like to express my humblest gratitude for the employment opportunity you offered recently as Assistant Evil Leader of the World. However, at this time I feel that I must respectfully decline the offer. I fear that the person currently holding this position has done so incredibly well, that my services would appear inadequate in comparison. I hope that by declining your offer I do not jeopardize our continuing agreement, as I look forward to many years of mutually fulfilling service.
most humbly,
me
P.S. by the way, i truly appreciated the irony of having Dick speak about evil at the Auschwitz ceremony, well done.
the reply
Dear evildoer,
I understand your reluctance to hold the position Mr. Cheney has so adequately filled for the past four years, and I accept your reason for declining. Our current agreement will not be affected, keep the souls coming my way and Ill keep your pockets full. And thanks, I had a good chuckle about his speech too, damn Im funny.
Sincerely,
The Dark Lord of all that is Political -Satan
P.S. I told Mark Burnett about that idea you had, he wanted me to thank you, he thinks working with Martha is a great idea and as soon as shes out theyll start preproduction.
please ignore that last part, i dont know what hes talking about there. id never unleash such an evil idea on the tv world.
temporary change of profile pic, at least until i wake up
TIM: Follow. But! Follow only if ye be men of valor, for the entrance to this cave is guarded by a creature so foul, so cruel that no man yet has fought with it and lived! Bones of full fifty men lie strewn about its lair. So, brave knights, if you do doubt your courage or your strength, come no further, for death awaits you all with nasty, big, pointy teeth.
ARTHUR: Where?
TIM: There!
ARTHUR: What, behind the rabbit?
TIM: It is the rabbit!
ARTHUR: You silly sod!
TIM: What?
ARTHUR: You got us all worked up!
TIM: Well, that's no ordinary rabbit.
ARTHUR: Ohh.
TIM: That's the most foul, cruel, and bad-tempered rodent you ever set eyes on.
ROBIN: You tit! I soiled my armor I was so scared!
TIM: Look, that rabbit's got a vicious streak a mile wide; it's a killer!
GALAHAD: Get stuffed!
TIM: He'll do you up a treat mate!
GALAHAD: Oh, yeah?
ROBIN: You mangy scots git!
TIM: I'm warning you!
ROBIN: What's he do, nibble your bum?
TIM: He's got huge, sharp-- eh-- he can leap about-- look at the bones!
ARTHUR: Go on, Bors. Chop his head off!
BORS: Right! Silly little bleeder. One rabbit stew comin' right up!
[ Rabbit flies at Borss throat and savages him to death }
ROBIN: I done it again!
TIM: I warned you, but did you listen to me? Oh, no, you knew it all, didn't you? Oh, it's just a harmless little bunny, isn't it? Well, it's always the same. I always tell them--
ARTHUR: Oh, shut up!
TIM: Do they listen to me?
id like to share a recent letter i wrote and the reply that i just received
Dear Satan,
I would like to express my humblest gratitude for the employment opportunity you offered recently as Assistant Evil Leader of the World. However, at this time I feel that I must respectfully decline the offer. I fear that the person currently holding this position has done so incredibly well, that my services would appear inadequate in comparison. I hope that by declining your offer I do not jeopardize our continuing agreement, as I look forward to many years of mutually fulfilling service.
most humbly,
me
P.S. by the way, i truly appreciated the irony of having Dick speak about evil at the Auschwitz ceremony, well done.
the reply
Dear evildoer,
I understand your reluctance to hold the position Mr. Cheney has so adequately filled for the past four years, and I accept your reason for declining. Our current agreement will not be affected, keep the souls coming my way and Ill keep your pockets full. And thanks, I had a good chuckle about his speech too, damn Im funny.
Sincerely,
The Dark Lord of all that is Political -Satan
P.S. I told Mark Burnett about that idea you had, he wanted me to thank you, he thinks working with Martha is a great idea and as soon as shes out theyll start preproduction.
please ignore that last part, i dont know what hes talking about there. id never unleash such an evil idea on the tv world.
temporary change of profile pic, at least until i wake up
TIM: Follow. But! Follow only if ye be men of valor, for the entrance to this cave is guarded by a creature so foul, so cruel that no man yet has fought with it and lived! Bones of full fifty men lie strewn about its lair. So, brave knights, if you do doubt your courage or your strength, come no further, for death awaits you all with nasty, big, pointy teeth.
ARTHUR: Where?
TIM: There!
ARTHUR: What, behind the rabbit?
TIM: It is the rabbit!
ARTHUR: You silly sod!
TIM: What?
ARTHUR: You got us all worked up!
TIM: Well, that's no ordinary rabbit.
ARTHUR: Ohh.
TIM: That's the most foul, cruel, and bad-tempered rodent you ever set eyes on.
ROBIN: You tit! I soiled my armor I was so scared!
TIM: Look, that rabbit's got a vicious streak a mile wide; it's a killer!
GALAHAD: Get stuffed!
TIM: He'll do you up a treat mate!
GALAHAD: Oh, yeah?
ROBIN: You mangy scots git!
TIM: I'm warning you!
ROBIN: What's he do, nibble your bum?
TIM: He's got huge, sharp-- eh-- he can leap about-- look at the bones!
ARTHUR: Go on, Bors. Chop his head off!
BORS: Right! Silly little bleeder. One rabbit stew comin' right up!
[ Rabbit flies at Borss throat and savages him to death }
ROBIN: I done it again!
TIM: I warned you, but did you listen to me? Oh, no, you knew it all, didn't you? Oh, it's just a harmless little bunny, isn't it? Well, it's always the same. I always tell them--
ARTHUR: Oh, shut up!
TIM: Do they listen to me?
And the correspondence with Satan made me laugh. Good stuff