I should briefly explain before diving into this: I was "diagnosed" with Crohn's Disease some years back (Not sure what is it?
Wikipedia it!) When I was 16, I would get extremely ill once a month and lose 15-25 pounds within 2-4 days. It wasn't pretty. Major tests were run, and Crohn's was the diagnosis even though its extremely difficult to officially label the disease, hence me writing diagnosed in parenthesis.
There's no cure for Crohn's. No surgery, no medication, no form of exercise. I am in pain 80% of the day. I'm used to it by now. You get to a point where you can either dwell upon whats happening to you, or you can get on with it and have your good and bad days. I choose to live my life by the latter. I don't want the sympathy, I don't want the pity, I want to be viewed as a normal individual trying to live her life as she sees fit.
At Club Suicide Saturday night I started experiencing this insane pain in my lower right abdomen every time I would cough. I didn't think much of it, in fact, I woke up Saturday morning with a mild cold and attributed to that.
Sunday rolls around. The pain starts to come into play every time I sneeze and speak. Odd. But not unusual for me in anyway. I head to my shoot I have that day for SG and various promotions.
Monday morning. I can barely speak. Even breathing and moving is causing pain. I suck it up and go on with my day. I'm in Guitar Center when a friend finally says to me "Either you go to Urgent Care now, or I'm phoning an ambulance". Well then! I drive myself to Urgent Care. Lo and behold, they call 911 for me and I end up in a bloody ambulance anyways. I hate hospitals, I avoid them at all costs.
ER. They are going in between my appendix, pancreas and a possible ovarian cyst. I'm admitted to a bed and forced to stay the night.
Tuesday morning. I look like hell and I won't lie. I'm paler than I normally am and am having issues breathing. I need an oxygen mask and I am on some form of painkiller that is causing my blood pressure to drop dramatically and my white blood cell count is through the roof. Nothing is staying down. Finally a surgeon visits. They want to go in for exploratory surgery, though they are certain my appendix is to blame officially. If it is, they are taking it out. If not, they are still taking it out and then figuring out further what the hell is up. Whatever, just get me out of here!
I've never had surgery. I've never broken a bone. The most I've had done is cat scans, an endoscopy, blood tests, a colonoscopy and ultrasounds of various organs. Needless to say, I'm a bit nervous.
So they slice me open in 3 different areas of my belly round 7 pm and I finally come to at 1 am this morning. If I thought the pain from before was terrible or the pain from Crohn's, man, was I wrong. I am in pain. Still am. ALOT. fuck me!
Here's where I'm a bit excited- they remove my appendix and tell me that all around the appendix was infected and swollen and not pretty. My cavity was filled with fluid. They tell me its possible its been like this for years, which could have been adding to my pain of Crohn's. After I'm fully healed, I may ACTUALLY not be in pain so much. I'm truly hoping this is the case and that, maybe, just maybe, I can get on with living my life with Crohn's without having to worry so bloody much.
Oh, and I'm home now. Faster recovery ever, even though I have a walker and stitches and am out of commission for a few weeks. I had to get outta there.
So, in closing to this short little, what happened to Vianca? blog, I thank you all for the kind emails and messages. I'm alive. I promise
