vervain______

i have hated him again, and it is too bad how you take what you would think would be mine hoping to ignite a fire there, the cold wave of fear to move me towards your action. i am just trying to be clever, it matters, you know. he stopped by the door while i orgasmed and does'nt it figure his movement stops by the door but the other one is fishing for something. has dumb ideas to impose. he is new to this world and so am i but in some different way. his fingers were so cold he kept writing because if he did'nt he would go insane with hunger or cold. couldn't you just see it? the scarf around his neck sometime in the nineteen tens? but i lost him anyway on the phone unless he calls back. when pleasure is hard to find you go still to those places that in your right mind you called foolish or in a worse state, unimportant. why does it matter anyway? oh, but it does - to have that good and rich life somewhere in your mind, somewhere in your mind.