you better do
what you need
to
to get through
this.
you've had years
to prepare,
you have had years
removed.
so
borrow
the war mask
admire
the edge
of a sharp
knife
that cuts
and divides.
put steel
through
your nose
travel to get there.
wanting his arms.
moving closer
to him.
the light of the
television
is an ugly
light.
he holds himself...
Read More
what you need
to
to get through
this.
you've had years
to prepare,
you have had years
removed.
so
borrow
the war mask
admire
the edge
of a sharp
knife
that cuts
and divides.
put steel
through
your nose
travel to get there.
wanting his arms.
moving closer
to him.
the light of the
television
is an ugly
light.
he holds himself...
Read More
close up -
your jewelry.
your lip is
swollen,
i see that
there
in that
close up,
the jewelry.
that hole
still
a hole
there
under
your
stainless
steel.
more telling
than
your
telling tale.
your jewelry.
your lip is
swollen,
i see that
there
in that
close up,
the jewelry.
that hole
still
a hole
there
under
your
stainless
steel.
more telling
than
your
telling tale.
one eye
on the road
no eyes
on the road.
i pass crackers
back
to small hands
broken in half
so he doesn't choke
on them.
i look in my rear view
to make sure
they
go down
okay.
i am
a beserker
a mother
on caffiene,
rolling fast
and furious
to get home.
my explanations
have disappeared.
i trick him into getting
in the...
Read More
on the road
no eyes
on the road.
i pass crackers
back
to small hands
broken in half
so he doesn't choke
on them.
i look in my rear view
to make sure
they
go down
okay.
i am
a beserker
a mother
on caffiene,
rolling fast
and furious
to get home.
my explanations
have disappeared.
i trick him into getting
in the...
Read More
took my babe for his 15 month check-up (with three shots included) my sister came with me, much needed. i was super nervous. i was smart and bypassed the coffee. i hate when my little one gets hurt. he doesn't understand the whole shot thing (i don't either. it took me until his 4th month to break down and get him vaccinated.) i have a...
Read More
Read More
you are
my idea
of freedom.
you get something
and attach yourself
to it
and then
you don't feel
alone.
the stories you
curl up
to read,
the plate of
sweet cookies
near your hand,
the planes,
and trains
and buses
that take you closer
to anything
beautiful.
i sink myself into you
so that i
am not so alone
so that i
may have...
Read More
my idea
of freedom.
you get something
and attach yourself
to it
and then
you don't feel
alone.
the stories you
curl up
to read,
the plate of
sweet cookies
near your hand,
the planes,
and trains
and buses
that take you closer
to anything
beautiful.
i sink myself into you
so that i
am not so alone
so that i
may have...
Read More
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
friedhamster:
The help I need is the kind I'll be seeing a mental doctor for.
Eating? Yep. Good food? Yes.
Drinking? Plenty (no, not booze. Just good water and tea, milk, etc.)
Sleep? Yep, my sleep patern is wacky since my work hours are. But I get good sleep.
What else was there? Telling myself bad things? No, none. Good things actually. I keep telling myself that no matter how bad it is, no matter how bad it gets it can always get better. So I'll just look forward to getting the help I need for my screwy head and, hey, maybe other good things will happen too.
Eating? Yep. Good food? Yes.
Drinking? Plenty (no, not booze. Just good water and tea, milk, etc.)
Sleep? Yep, my sleep patern is wacky since my work hours are. But I get good sleep.
What else was there? Telling myself bad things? No, none. Good things actually. I keep telling myself that no matter how bad it is, no matter how bad it gets it can always get better. So I'll just look forward to getting the help I need for my screwy head and, hey, maybe other good things will happen too.
friedhamster:
Yep, yep. It's just going around at work I think. Plus I really haven't been sick for a few years. I guess I'm due for it.
your hair is dirty
again
your beard
is growing longer
i tell you
you need a shower
and your suprised
that i know
you do.
i want to cry
about many things
i have wanted to cry
since
we spoke
having that short time
to say something
to each other
while he slept.
i am sorry.
i am sorry
for things
i don't even know...
Read More
again
your beard
is growing longer
i tell you
you need a shower
and your suprised
that i know
you do.
i want to cry
about many things
i have wanted to cry
since
we spoke
having that short time
to say something
to each other
while he slept.
i am sorry.
i am sorry
for things
i don't even know...
Read More
i am looking for clues.
i am not sure of what
but i am delibrate
seated in the dark
of my aunt's living room
while the rest of
the family laughs in the
warmth and light
of the kitchen.
each slide i hold
could be a possible answer.
my mother at 15.
the isolation and awkwardness
of a teenager easily shows in her eyes
but...
Read More
i am not sure of what
but i am delibrate
seated in the dark
of my aunt's living room
while the rest of
the family laughs in the
warmth and light
of the kitchen.
each slide i hold
could be a possible answer.
my mother at 15.
the isolation and awkwardness
of a teenager easily shows in her eyes
but...
Read More
bodsht:
the imagery is truly moving/ message me T
ayun,
this is when the questions start
in a darkened room
at the half hour mark
when he still hasn't fallen asleep
when he still hasn't
let go
of me.
my shrink said
i would have to put my
emotional baggage behind me
to do the right thing for my child
and
let him learn how
to go to sleep by himself.
she said
forget...
Read More
this is when the questions start
in a darkened room
at the half hour mark
when he still hasn't fallen asleep
when he still hasn't
let go
of me.
my shrink said
i would have to put my
emotional baggage behind me
to do the right thing for my child
and
let him learn how
to go to sleep by himself.
she said
forget...
Read More
i am not so blind
to think the story
begins
and ends
with my own.
you have your own
version even if
you would never
tell me what it was.
after the arguement,
i am left alone
again.
none of this is
black and white
(it never has been)
or folded up
neatly
to tuck
away/ to hide.
it is ugly
and ongoing.
it doesn't...
Read More
to think the story
begins
and ends
with my own.
you have your own
version even if
you would never
tell me what it was.
after the arguement,
i am left alone
again.
none of this is
black and white
(it never has been)
or folded up
neatly
to tuck
away/ to hide.
it is ugly
and ongoing.
it doesn't...
Read More
crumbs for hansel,
gretel isn't here yet
the other half of me
not yet exposed
to that possible oven.
the thought of gretel
anyway
sends me reeling
at one time,
it seemed like
a good idea.
luckily
this morning
i moved
the knive's handle
out of his reach
pushing it further
back on the counter.
i take my obvious
accomplishments
when i can
but
the...
Read More
gretel isn't here yet
the other half of me
not yet exposed
to that possible oven.
the thought of gretel
anyway
sends me reeling
at one time,
it seemed like
a good idea.
luckily
this morning
i moved
the knive's handle
out of his reach
pushing it further
back on the counter.
i take my obvious
accomplishments
when i can
but
the...
Read More
i'm
running another
red.
i'm going
on another
fool's erand
dragging my ass
more than halfway
across town,
taking in
big gulps of
air
to gain
my freedom.
of course,
the guilt
in me
has
its own voice,
it says
who needs
freedom
when you have a
child,
a healthy child
a smart child?
but
i don't always
listen
to
that
voice.
i remind myself...
Read More
running another
red.
i'm going
on another
fool's erand
dragging my ass
more than halfway
across town,
taking in
big gulps of
air
to gain
my freedom.
of course,
the guilt
in me
has
its own voice,
it says
who needs
freedom
when you have a
child,
a healthy child
a smart child?
but
i don't always
listen
to
that
voice.
i remind myself...
Read More
she says
i hope
we can
get together
today
and
i feel like hell
with a
as always
and
what's new?
there is nothing to say
on this end,
my end,
now.
there is only a thick silence
no more
wasted words /
expressed worry
though
the worry is here
giving off
its own quiet waves.
she never could
take care of herself.
she could...
Read More
i hope
we can
get together
today
and
i feel like hell
with a
as always
and
what's new?
there is nothing to say
on this end,
my end,
now.
there is only a thick silence
no more
wasted words /
expressed worry
though
the worry is here
giving off
its own quiet waves.
she never could
take care of herself.
she could...
Read More