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Sometimes when you are sad and not for any certain reason, you reach out. And sometimes when the hand you find is cold and cannot squeeze yours back, you cry just one tear. And it rolls slowly over your eyelid, crawling its way down your face. Dampening your clothes. DId someone step in for a brief moment, pet the dog, and then steal my heart? For right now is seems I am in posession of a cavernous hole, right where it was supposed to be. I know that I spend most of my time pretending to be a big tough guy, and then when I must take it all off at night, I find I cannot. Hands and feet are bound, and nothing can happen. We are frozen here. Lying prone on the ground, bound for eternity. I guess I am looking, and never will cease, for that moment when it all becomes ok. I guess I am not destined for such a fate. Although I know it is also beyond the grasp of the other 6 billion people running about this planet, I feel like I have been cheated. Who would really dare to steal my perfection. All set aside, measured carefully. But hanging out of my reach and I am Sisyphus eternally bound to my task. I view the boulder with distain. For it has taken from me something innate. And I am left with this chasm. I looked at my face today, and realized that I am alone here. My thoughts are a self contained unit. Hearing sounds of the outside world a minor annoyance which I avoid. I have different moments of reality which I cannot marry despite my best attempts. Or was I offered the hand and it was mine that was cold and could not squeeze back. No one will tell me.