venusless

i woke up this morning after having a dream that i was publicly humiliated by my own horrible dancing at a missy elliot show (what?!). dreams are always really hazy for me, but i remember attempting to break dance, being laughing at, and then having a giant speaker fall on me and kill me. then i woke up. seriously.

i laid in bed and ate a peanut butter and jelly sandwich while i read another fifty pages or so of killing yourself to live. when i finally decided to get moving and shower, i turned on the mp3 player that had been set to "shuffle all tracks," and the first song to come on was "come pick me up" by ryan adams, which i have now decided for the 150th time is one of the best songs i have ever heard in my entire life.

i am trying not to romanticize my every waking thought and movement while i'm living alone in this studio apartment without a television or the internet (though, i'm happy to report that i am at a 'net cafe that allows 30 free minutes with a purchase of a beverage. totally sweet!) to distract me from my own self-absorbed thoughts and movements. i have to say that i really enjoy making peanut butter and jelly sandwiches while naked. i just wish that i had a boyfriend with a car and a t.v. and some really good bedroom skills to distract me from myself.