velocity

In our prep week, today is what we've dubbed "Fun Day". We had speakers from the Minneapolis Gang Strike Force, the Bomb Squad, and the ATF. Then we wrote lists of things we liked about our coworkers, but that wasn't as fun as the other stuff.

Here is a list of things I learned from the Bomb Squad:

• I learned how to make a bomb, only out of household items, that can completely pulverize a wooden mannequin.


• I learned how to make many different kinds of bombs.


• I learned that a Disney lunch box is a convenient place to hide a bomb.


• I learned that many people who think they're funny try to bomb police stations with bombs hidden in Dunkin' Donuts boxes.


• I learned that the Bomb Squad thinks it's a good idea to get students involved in the crisis prevention process. We decided their job would be to sweep the parking lot for suspicious looking packages, and then to pick them up and shake them to make sure they're not bombs.


• I learned that the Bomb Squad's main prevention technique is to "decrease proximity." It's like their answer to "stop, drop, and roll."


• I learned that a lot of times if you get a suspicious package, it's just a ploy to get you to evacuate the building so that snipers can pick you off in the parking lot.


• And finally, I learned that if you call the bomb squad, they bring robots and puppy dogs. It's a fact!

From my coworkers, I learned that aside from the predictable "witty," "clever," "cute," and "smart," a fair amount of people said I was honest. I think that's weird. I mean, it's not that I'm dishonest, but I've just never thought honesty was one of my defining features. Well, I guess it is. Take it from me: you can take it from me!