vassago

I haven't written in a really long time.
I haven't even looked around the site in over six months... i wonder if there any good new sets?

I dont think i write because it isnt like anyone would read this anyway. I write entries all day long on paper.

I wish I had some good news, but my life is a total sewer.

I dont really leave my house much anymore.
I dont call anyone.

I got really sad along time ago, i couldnt much help it... everyone kept turning away. The thing is, i have stayed sad.
Living like this is at least humbling.. this past year has altered everything for me. Flavor, color, sound... everything has become so empty, so overly real.
It hurts like hell.
Everything is always hurting.

But, at least I have been humbled, simplified.
Eyes down...

I cannot describe the torture or the hollowness of a life without a little human reflection. It is not something i could ever wish on you.
Still, what I wouldnt give for that dreamt-of embrace.
Anything at all.

Am I supposed to think that this is more noble?
...always feeling like a tree in a desert?

Anyhow, the pondering and the bellyaching is irrevelant. I deserve this, as i have earned it.

I have even managed to drive away the very last reflection in my life.. my closest, my only.
And I canot do without that.
I refuse. Lucky for you that there wont be much to mourn.

I want out of here.. i am bored, I am burned out.
"home" sounds so great.. and so far away.