"We spend all of our lives goin' out of our minds
Looking back to our birth, forward to our demise
Even scientists say, everything is just light
Not created, destroyed but eternally bright
Masters in everytime, lord in everyplace
Those who stood up for love, down in spite of the hate"
- Live "They Stood Up For Love"
The Light
I put so much of my energy into trying to light the way for others, I sometimes forget that it's okay to bask in the light of another. I sometimes forget that it's possible to be loved for who I am, rather than for what I've done for someone. I sometimes forget that I'm a part of this beautiful banding of people I've brought together called Tribe Arcane. I sometimes forget that they are there for me as I've been there for them. I sometimes forget that I am loved. I sometimes get so wrapped up in what I haven't accomplished that I forget to step back and take joy in what I have done. Sometimes the fact that I haven't saved the world makes me forget that I've done a lot of good for those around me.
It just kind of hit me this morning that when you really look at it, I'm kind of popular. I've always had a lot of friends and even some admirers. I'm pretty well connected. I have a well earned good reputation. My word means something, which is high praise in an understandably distrusting society. I'm always afraid to take too much pride in myself for fear of becoming arrogant, but I think I really should enjoy being me more than I do. It's one thing to be humble, but I'm realizing I have a tendency to be selfeffacing and that's why I find myself feeling so apart from the people I want to be close to. It's funny how I can stand for so much, but do it in a way that deflects all praise and support away from myself. Like I have to do everything alone, martyring myself to the causes of honor, community, and love. It seems somehow that I've missed my own point.
Looking back to our birth, forward to our demise
Even scientists say, everything is just light
Not created, destroyed but eternally bright
Masters in everytime, lord in everyplace
Those who stood up for love, down in spite of the hate"
- Live "They Stood Up For Love"
The Light
I put so much of my energy into trying to light the way for others, I sometimes forget that it's okay to bask in the light of another. I sometimes forget that it's possible to be loved for who I am, rather than for what I've done for someone. I sometimes forget that I'm a part of this beautiful banding of people I've brought together called Tribe Arcane. I sometimes forget that they are there for me as I've been there for them. I sometimes forget that I am loved. I sometimes get so wrapped up in what I haven't accomplished that I forget to step back and take joy in what I have done. Sometimes the fact that I haven't saved the world makes me forget that I've done a lot of good for those around me.
It just kind of hit me this morning that when you really look at it, I'm kind of popular. I've always had a lot of friends and even some admirers. I'm pretty well connected. I have a well earned good reputation. My word means something, which is high praise in an understandably distrusting society. I'm always afraid to take too much pride in myself for fear of becoming arrogant, but I think I really should enjoy being me more than I do. It's one thing to be humble, but I'm realizing I have a tendency to be selfeffacing and that's why I find myself feeling so apart from the people I want to be close to. It's funny how I can stand for so much, but do it in a way that deflects all praise and support away from myself. Like I have to do everything alone, martyring myself to the causes of honor, community, and love. It seems somehow that I've missed my own point.