"This house is like russia with eyes cold and grey,
You got me moving in a circle, i dyed my hair red today.
I just want a little passion to hold me in the dark,
I know i got some magic buried deep in my heart, yeah
But my priest says, "you ain't saving no souls."
My father says, "you ain't makin' any money."
My doctor says, "you just took it to the limit,"
And here i stand with this sword in my hand"
- Tori Amos "Take To The Sky"
Bothersome Birthday Musings
I'm doing something I almost never, ever do. I'm drinking alone. Beer even. Normally, this would mean that I'm really depressed. I'm not, though. Not this time. I'm just tense and a soak in a hot tub barely made a dent in the knots in my shoulders and back. I need a good massage, but that ain't happening so a good buzz is the next best thing for getting my mind off the fact that it feels like the muscles in my shoulders are playing the world's most epic game of tug-of-war with my neck as the rope.
The date on the computer now says April 5th, meaning that there is exactly two months left until my birthday. I reflect back on my last birthday. It was pleasant, albeit uneventful really. I even worked on it, which I have always adamently refused to do in the past. However, Wyspurr and I had just moved into our apartment, finally getting on our feet here in Atlanta, so I couldn't afford to risk my job by refusing to go in on my birthday even though I'd asked for it off over a month in advance, and I really didn't have any friends here to celebrate my birthday with anyway. I was lucky to have Belfazaar there, who came down from Asheville to hang with me on my birthday.
I was hoping that this coming birthday would be more like my birthday before last. It's hard to say if that's even a remote possibility. Few of my old friends would travel to Atlanta just for a birthday party in my honor. belfazaar maybe. Ocean and Stitch will likely be preoccupied with the fact that Stitch will be ready to pop out a baby at any moment, so partying won't be on their list of things to do this summer. katfireblade...well, I don't know...she's a wild card and there's no telling where she will be, what she will be doing, and whether or not she'll have gotten on my last nerve by two months from now. The only one of my old friends who I can say is likely to be at my birthday party is holierthancow and even he might have too many things going on at the time.
As for my new friends, it's hard to really say that I have any. Aside from geckogirl, I'm not particularly close to anyone I've met here in Atlanta. I don't want my birthday party to be a bunch of people who are really just aquaintances who are there for the party, not me.
Anyway, enough musing over this...I need to get some sleep.
You got me moving in a circle, i dyed my hair red today.
I just want a little passion to hold me in the dark,
I know i got some magic buried deep in my heart, yeah
But my priest says, "you ain't saving no souls."
My father says, "you ain't makin' any money."
My doctor says, "you just took it to the limit,"
And here i stand with this sword in my hand"
- Tori Amos "Take To The Sky"
Bothersome Birthday Musings
I'm doing something I almost never, ever do. I'm drinking alone. Beer even. Normally, this would mean that I'm really depressed. I'm not, though. Not this time. I'm just tense and a soak in a hot tub barely made a dent in the knots in my shoulders and back. I need a good massage, but that ain't happening so a good buzz is the next best thing for getting my mind off the fact that it feels like the muscles in my shoulders are playing the world's most epic game of tug-of-war with my neck as the rope.
The date on the computer now says April 5th, meaning that there is exactly two months left until my birthday. I reflect back on my last birthday. It was pleasant, albeit uneventful really. I even worked on it, which I have always adamently refused to do in the past. However, Wyspurr and I had just moved into our apartment, finally getting on our feet here in Atlanta, so I couldn't afford to risk my job by refusing to go in on my birthday even though I'd asked for it off over a month in advance, and I really didn't have any friends here to celebrate my birthday with anyway. I was lucky to have Belfazaar there, who came down from Asheville to hang with me on my birthday.
I was hoping that this coming birthday would be more like my birthday before last. It's hard to say if that's even a remote possibility. Few of my old friends would travel to Atlanta just for a birthday party in my honor. belfazaar maybe. Ocean and Stitch will likely be preoccupied with the fact that Stitch will be ready to pop out a baby at any moment, so partying won't be on their list of things to do this summer. katfireblade...well, I don't know...she's a wild card and there's no telling where she will be, what she will be doing, and whether or not she'll have gotten on my last nerve by two months from now. The only one of my old friends who I can say is likely to be at my birthday party is holierthancow and even he might have too many things going on at the time.
As for my new friends, it's hard to really say that I have any. Aside from geckogirl, I'm not particularly close to anyone I've met here in Atlanta. I don't want my birthday party to be a bunch of people who are really just aquaintances who are there for the party, not me.
Anyway, enough musing over this...I need to get some sleep.