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vanuslux

Atlanta, GA

Member Since 2004

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Monday Jun 12, 2006

Jun 12, 2006
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R.I.P. - Merrill "Skippy" Clifton White 2/28/36 - 6/12/06

Today a great man passed away. He wasn't famous. He wasn't rich. He was just one of the finest examples of a real man I've ever know. He was holierthancow's father and he was like a father to me. He was kind and generous. He was hard working and responsible. He had only one arm and did the work of five for most of his life without bitching or moaning about it. The world would be a far better place if there were more men like Skippy in it.

One of my favorite memories of Skippy was when he had a few of his friends over after a hard day on the farm. I walked in on them having some beers at the dining table and he introduces us. I shook the hand of the two men who were close to me and just sort of waved to the man on the far side of the table, who by coincidence was the one black man in the room. I certainly had no qualm about shaking a black man's hand...I just had a qualm about having to stretch out over a table to do so. But later Skippy had a private talk with me about it because he misunderstood why I hadn't shaken the man's hand. He didn't ream me for it, but explained in an almost TV fatherly way that it wasn't right to snub a man for his color but he didn't push me after I explained I hadn't been acting out of racism but rather just being too lazy to go out of my way to shake the third man's hand.

I learned something important from that conversation. Not that it's bad to be racist because I hadn't cared a lick that he was black. What I learned was a powerful lesson about perception and how you can slight people from lazy carelessness. I realized that other people aren't mind readers and only see what you do, not your thoughts behind what you do. So I try to always be mindful of how my actions affect others, and I learned that from Skippy. Skippy was one of the most important figures of my youth not just because he was my best friend's father but also because he was one of the few men in my life that was worthy of being looked up to.

He'll be missed. He made the world a slightly better place than it would have been without him and I can't say that about many.

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