v8dreaming

random things that go through my head during the day...


where have all the blue jays gone? i've been looking for them for while (months) and have seen only two.
where did they go? same thing goes for snail. i've seen none. slugs sure, but no snails.

i really hate the fact that i can't afford a place on my own, but i am thankful to have a place to sleep at night and a family that cares. honestly, i have no idea where i would be right now without them. with the shitty attitude that i have, it's hard for me to let them really know how much i appreciate what they have done for me.

it's sad that when i'm at work i have to go outside to get away from the heat.
we're a very large company and we can't afford ventilation in this fucking place? how retarded is that shit? i guess they'll do something about it when somebody passes out from the heat. it was almost 95 degrees in the shop today. wonder what it's gonna be like when it's 95 outside.

i feel that most people are more important than myself.

i really wish my foreman would shut the fuck up.

where the hell is all my money going? well, besides my truck. i used to be really good at budgetting myself. now, it seems like it's gone as soon as i get it. i really need to work on that.

i miss being in love. yeah, i know it's stupid, but i do. maybe i'm retarded. that would explain a whole hell of alot.
i let fear control my life way to much. seriously, it fucks me over in alot of ways. afraid of life of rejection. i'm not good enough. i feel my life is mundane and really not worth talking about. i don't see things the way i wish i did.
i'm 30 and life is passing me by. i feel like i'm so far behind where i should be that i'll never get there.


i want to be a mongoose.