And once again it begins...
I sat at my favorite spot, waves crashing helplessly by my feet. Giant fish poking angular fins out of the water and effortlessly diving downward to devour the bugs they have caught. The same glittering lights move strain to move toward me but remain caught in the wake of a passing boat. Out of the darkness, a sliver of dorsal fin appears, then another. Dolphins. No manatees dammit! The sight has a cruel beauty to it, and it leaves me breathless and overwhelmed. Between my tears, I watch them gliding side by side in the brackish water, disappearing behind a houseboat. Some cultures believe that dolphins are those of us who have passed on, and rise up out of the sea at dusk to have parties in human form once again. Other believe that dolphins are a symbol of passionately embracing life and good fortune. Maybe they were a sign?
I am at peace, with the one person who feels like home and like a whirlwind threatening to pull me apart where I am weakest. We sit talking about the best times- six months of stability and then almost two years of mediocrity. I promise that I will never forget those times. There was so much to say, and none of it meant anything profound because it had all been said time and time again. A promise to visit, that things will be sorted out. There are things I cannot begin to explain- like exercising my elephants and the french-whore-red-flowers or the night we made the table. I have to say goodbye in just four days.... My heart still continues to beat, even though it is slowly breaking.
My emotions are out of control, and I am only adding to their chaos.
I sat at my favorite spot, waves crashing helplessly by my feet. Giant fish poking angular fins out of the water and effortlessly diving downward to devour the bugs they have caught. The same glittering lights move strain to move toward me but remain caught in the wake of a passing boat. Out of the darkness, a sliver of dorsal fin appears, then another. Dolphins. No manatees dammit! The sight has a cruel beauty to it, and it leaves me breathless and overwhelmed. Between my tears, I watch them gliding side by side in the brackish water, disappearing behind a houseboat. Some cultures believe that dolphins are those of us who have passed on, and rise up out of the sea at dusk to have parties in human form once again. Other believe that dolphins are a symbol of passionately embracing life and good fortune. Maybe they were a sign?
I am at peace, with the one person who feels like home and like a whirlwind threatening to pull me apart where I am weakest. We sit talking about the best times- six months of stability and then almost two years of mediocrity. I promise that I will never forget those times. There was so much to say, and none of it meant anything profound because it had all been said time and time again. A promise to visit, that things will be sorted out. There are things I cannot begin to explain- like exercising my elephants and the french-whore-red-flowers or the night we made the table. I have to say goodbye in just four days.... My heart still continues to beat, even though it is slowly breaking.
My emotions are out of control, and I am only adding to their chaos.