I don't know how to say this, I really don't. Please, if you wish to continue reading understand that this comes from a place of mania, as well as a newfound a very profound calling. *Trigger warning mental illness.* (a form of bipolar at play)

I have just spent the day very slowly, methodically, and in a real way sadistically healing, loosening up an old injury, and then punishing my body very very very very slowly.

I suppose I should start over, and give you some context.

I am a energy worker.

I have been for over 25 years.

My artform is the healing art of Reiki.

I am a level 2 practitioner, have been since the age of 12, and feel no real pressing need to take on a title of "master."

I recently began to have a brain bug. This bug manifested as a simple thought. I think I might be a daoist.

I have since taken up a study of the dao de jing. I cast coins and consult the i-Ching...

I am teaching myself multiple styles of tai chi...

I am slooooooowly learning shaolin chin na.

I estimate it will take me a good 10-15 years to start to learn what i want to eventually learn...

This being said, the power of yin calls me.

Soft.

Gentle.

Overpowering strength by yealding. Yin... oh my. To study yin with the body in the gym? It...

So. Forget lifting weight... i did not go above 15 lbs, and i ache now. I described what I was doing to a friend, and they told me it had a name of some sort.... Isolationist decay? All I know is to lift away from core and hold suspended can work just as hard as reps.

I stretched my old injured shoulder for hours until it loosened with weight decay and tension, until then I enjoyed the sheer pleasure of movement. When I am in my 80s I hope to move too as Chen Man-Chin once did... Otherworldly.

Quietly. Softly. From a book. Overwhelming Yin.