twztdchik

We're in the second week of 'surviving grace'. I think the show blows, big time. Any show that actually uses the dialogue: "You may be fucking me, but I'll be making love to you", should automatically be banned from stages around the world. The old people love it, but then again, so did Doodyhead.

Went to Friday's on friday, expecting to meet Kourtnee. She didn't show...but that was alright, my daughters did. So Stephan, Courtney, Hyan & Pete (who I assume was the legendary Petey) and I started being loud, obnoxious, rude & just generally having a good time. So, a shot of jager, a disgusting Irish Car Bomb & some long islands later (interspersed with about 8 calls from Jeff) we leave. Except as I go to take Doodyhead home, Jeff calls, and though I suspect he's speaking English, all the liquor he's consumed has impaired his ability to do so. After about four more phone calls one of his little group of Marines decides to let me know where they are & we head to the Beach to meet them.

Let the entertainment commence:

We show up & they are running in traffic on Harmon, but stop long enough to come meet us...
Stephen can't go in because he's wearing a hoodie, so...
As I am getting offered 20 bucks to kiss Jeff while his friend watches...
One of Jeff's other friends begins removing clothing, so I become momentarily stunned & cannot answer...
So I get told the final offer is 20 bucks, I can kiss the guy who is offering while fondling Jeff...
I recover...
Jeff decide we are leaving, so we get my car from valet...
When Jeff decides to lose his mind over the fact that my black friend, who is also an arab has stolen his car & I have to help him find
him...
We head to the Ox, where my friends proceed to harrass drunken Jeff, eventually leading him to believe he has the Declaration of
Independance tattoed on his dick...
Jeff passes out, only to be carried to my car hours later...
When we get to my house, he starts talking to me in a combination of pig latin & some african clicking language...
Deven & I finally get him out of the car two hours later, and he has a yelling match with me over why I'm an asshole for not lying with
him when he passes out.

So Saturday you can imagine his surprise when he shows up to the Ox & everyone lets him know that, no, really Megan wasn't making it up...you really were so random & weird. We had a nice evening drinking & talking til like 6AM, so Sunday was a little painful.

In other news...
I quit my job yesterday, I don't start my new job til the 18th, so I'm on vacation. Which means all you little fuckheads that bitch & complain that I work too much to hang out with you during the week had better suck it up & call me. This may be your last chance.