twztdchik

It's Vegas.
So when a picky girl, like myself (ok, it's a lie, if a boy likes me, chances are I can find a reason to adore him back, it's the sticking with it that is hard) finds a great guy....

It's supposed to work out right?

You talk, you "click" as some would say. You meet and he's not some huge grotesque troll (like yourself), but something wholly unique to the town.

He's got a brain, it's intelligent. He's funny, much in the same way your friends always tell you are. He's got that kind of charisma that makes you want to hang out with him, and several hours into the nite, it doesn't disapear.

How do you catch a fish when all the other girls in town have everything you dont (read: looks, boobs, better body, whatever) to entice him.

You give all you can offer...all that witty conversation, and that thing where you are just yourself and he seems to get along with you anyways....

But he's just not yours.

Enough yours to make you think you maybe can finally have the one thing you want....

But enough not there to frustrate and annoy you for every second that he's gone.

It's like an oasis you can get to, but then cannot remember how to drink.

I've spent a lot of time becoming this ugly, bitter thing because I was tired of all the pain that life caused me. I hated giving my heart to someone only to find out I'd wasted my time and there was no one there to help me pick up the peices and move on.

And no I'm stuck trying to be better, and in sight of something that I want, but I still don't have the desire to put forth the effort and get it.

Because I am convinced I don't have a shot. I KNOW that every word is full of wasted breath, and every move is countered by someone I haven't met who has a better hold on what he wants, that for all the wanting in the world....



They'll always choose another.