twinkletwinkle

So unsure about everything right now. Rethinking the cosmetology thing, thinking about sonography which is basically an ultrasound technician. It's a two year program that they offer at lansing community college. Fuck, I'm twenty four fucking years old!!! I should have some idea about what I want to do. I feel as though I am at odds with everything and it depresses the hell out of me. Just been in a despondent mood for the past few months. I am busting my ass trying to lose weight. Exercising, eating next to nothing. Nothing seems to work. Maybe I wasn't meant to be 120 pounds again. I am so frustrated with this whole fucking situation. I feel as though I am a failure at life. I'm stuck in this dead end job when numerous people from my graduating class are pulling six figure salaries. I get no sense of satisfaction from my job like I thought I would. I feel like fucking shit all the time. I know that things could be so much worse and I'm tired of being in this woe is me mood. I wish I could just shake it off. I have no friends around here to hang out with. I just sit around all nerd like on my computer, waiting to go to work yet again. I feel as though everytime I get off of work I just have to go back in a few hours. So, basically it is just like a very long break. Well, gotta go to do some exercises that aren't going to do me a damn bit of good. I just feel like I am on a neverending hamster wheel. Running and trying so hard, but ultimately getting nowhere. I guess I'm going to see tool at the end of september so that will be something to look forward to.