I have had an epiphany lately. I am sick to FUCKING death of making excuses for myself. I have completely watered myself down to make myself more acceptable to the backwards ass fucks that I work with and I am very very tired of it. I conformed to make myself more physically and mentally acceptable to them and I am hating myself for it. These people are so godamned stupid. They have the vocabulary of a four year old child and the reasoning skills of well, I don't know what. I'm tired of feeling bad about myself and holing up in my apartment and eating out of boredom and chain smoking and not wearing what I wan't etc etc etc. I grow weary of this incessant, nagging, inferiority complex that has nagged me since I don't know when. If anything I think I should have an inferiority complex because chances are I am just as smart as the average joe, if not smarter. I feel like I am finally taking steps to becoming the person I want to be, the person I see myself as in my head. I am sick of feelign bad about myself, I am also sick of isolating myself.
