Alrighty. So I want to apologize for yesterday's post. Sometimes, as we all know, life deals a really shitty hand and we just can't help but fold. Yesterday was one of those hands. I finally found myself some employment, but good god, I had not a fucking clue what I had gotten myself into. Cleaning shit stains (and I'm in no way exaggerating) of wealthy people's toilets for 10.5 hours (Which, might I ad, I only got paid for 8 of!!!) at a measly wage of $8. Talk about kicking yourself for dropping out of school, huh? Did you know I'd of already had my associates degree last fall? Don't I feel like an asshole.
I got hired on Wednesday night. I was super excited. I called my mom and told her the good news. I repeat, I had not a fucking clue. Do you remember, say, in high school - just for example - when you met someone you were really into, and sparks flew for a minute or two... oh! the excitement! And then a day later, you found out that they weren't into you at all? Oh! The dissapointment. Thats how I felt yesterday. Complete and utter disappointment.
So now I'm stuck. I'm not only in a financial dilemma, but a moral one as well. I really don't want to let anyone down, they're soo short handed, and the girls I work with are super nice. I suppose they're used to this kind of turnover rate, but it doesn't make me feel any better. Furthermore, and I know it sounds so totally lame; I don't want to disappoint my mom.
I had to go to the Urgent Care center today, because I felt as though someone was stabbing my intestines with a fork. It started when I got up, but I still went to work - only to leave an hour and a half later with rapidly increasing pain. It literally hurt to move. So I sought answers, none of which were found, but it was worth a shot. After ingesting drugs (Legal, that is), and taking a long nap, my mom called to see if my day had been any better than the last. Immediately upon informing her of today's events, she sounded, alas, disappointed that I hadn't stayed at work all day.
I hate that sound.
I honestly think she's the only reason I haven't quit yet... I've caused her so much disappointment in my lifetime; I can hardly stand to cause her more. Even if it is this trivial.
I'm trying really hard to stay positive. However, I feel even more overwhelmed then when I was unemployed.
What would you do?! Help!
And you know, its been two weeks and I still havent heard from London or Missy about test shooting. Does that mean I'm out?
I got hired on Wednesday night. I was super excited. I called my mom and told her the good news. I repeat, I had not a fucking clue. Do you remember, say, in high school - just for example - when you met someone you were really into, and sparks flew for a minute or two... oh! the excitement! And then a day later, you found out that they weren't into you at all? Oh! The dissapointment. Thats how I felt yesterday. Complete and utter disappointment.
So now I'm stuck. I'm not only in a financial dilemma, but a moral one as well. I really don't want to let anyone down, they're soo short handed, and the girls I work with are super nice. I suppose they're used to this kind of turnover rate, but it doesn't make me feel any better. Furthermore, and I know it sounds so totally lame; I don't want to disappoint my mom.
I had to go to the Urgent Care center today, because I felt as though someone was stabbing my intestines with a fork. It started when I got up, but I still went to work - only to leave an hour and a half later with rapidly increasing pain. It literally hurt to move. So I sought answers, none of which were found, but it was worth a shot. After ingesting drugs (Legal, that is), and taking a long nap, my mom called to see if my day had been any better than the last. Immediately upon informing her of today's events, she sounded, alas, disappointed that I hadn't stayed at work all day.
I hate that sound.
I honestly think she's the only reason I haven't quit yet... I've caused her so much disappointment in my lifetime; I can hardly stand to cause her more. Even if it is this trivial.
I'm trying really hard to stay positive. However, I feel even more overwhelmed then when I was unemployed.
What would you do?! Help!
And you know, its been two weeks and I still havent heard from London or Missy about test shooting. Does that mean I'm out?
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
im kinda in the same predicament, except i was suspended from school.
id say stick with the bullshit shit cleaning job while you can until you find another job.
all i do is remind myself that it is money..and only temporary.
everyone has to go through some shitty jobs and shitty times sometimes,
hang in there, love.