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turin

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Member Since 2003

Followers 89 Following 73

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Monday Nov 17, 2003

Nov 17, 2003
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I used to watch GI Joe religiously when I was a kid. Just another poorly written 30 minute toy commercial, I now realise, and not even the best of the lot. That would be Transformers. But it worked on me... I'd beg and beg, and once in a while, if I did enough yard work, dad would take me to toys r us and buy me a tank or something.
There were no more beautiful words to me than "assembly required."
After snapping the thing together, I'd slowly melt the little GI Joe men on a lightbulb, one limb at a time. I didn't want them; they were a lumpy, awkward representation of the organic that never seemed to have a place next to the sleek robotic deadliness that had thrillingly, miraculously found its way from the TV to my bedroom floor.
I INHALED A LOT OF PLASTIC FUMES.
But the writing on that show was insulting, even to an 8 year old. I vaguely remember an episode in which a giant blob was threatening freedom, and they tried to poison it by throwing apples at it. Because, you see, every apple seed has a tiny amount of cyanide in it.
That was great... the most elite, high-tech anti-terrorism corps of the US army had no weapon more powerful than the factoid! Knowing is half the battle.
All this ran through my head at work today after I accidentally ate some apple seeds. Three of them, I think. I'm either going to die of cyanide poisoning now, or else I will have to spend 3 months of the year in colorado for the rest of my life.

And then I thought, "maybe right now you should be focusing on the extremely deadly saw in your hand, dumbass."

I put up real pics of me!
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
franandzooey:
Ahhh, My friend Coughee! I do greatly appreciate the guess. You are the only one today who even bothered. And yes my friend you are correct!

My little sweetie eats kookoo for cocoa puffs (sorry to let the secret out) about twice a day, hence the cereal killer comment. I think that eating cereal as a meal replacement sort of constitutes a 'slim fast' type plan, but I am not one to judge. hehe.

I would say that you will win a cd of 8-bit but I seem to be address untrustworthy. Maybe a p.o. box that you would like it sent to??? O.k. I will leave it on your terms since there is no website to check if I am a serial killer (as of yet). hehe.

He is coming to see me friday and I want the world to know!!!
Nov 18, 2003
pocketrocket:
alright you won me as a friend. im a gijoe cartoon fan. you dont remeber the three part episodes where ship wreck was living a life where gijoe never existed. ah well..she wasnt a mermaid, she just could breath underwater.
anyway, you remeber the "arise serpentor arise" series where they ( cobra)"magicaly" took dna from the 10 most ruthless rulers the world has ever known and created the supreme empereor......you want to talk about falsity.
Nov 18, 2003

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