tuesdaymourning

As Im uploading some old pictures of mine Im getting a little sad. Im 40 lbs over weight. Im always tired and I feel that makes me a bad mom. I want to embrace my weight but Im use to being 90 lbs (pre pregnancy). My fiance thinks I look hot he says but our sex life isnt the best. So who do I believe my head or him? I diet (Im all about some soy and organic) I could exercise more I guess. I dont know Im just beating my self up.