I just got back from the club and doing bong hits to calm down...there were jello shots, lots of jell shots which turned out like it always does with me shakin' my J-Lo booty all over the dance floor. The bartender was super hot but when I said this Mark tells me, 'oh honey she's even straighter then you are'. I'm not exactly sure what to say to that, but took it to mean I wouldn't be making out with her anytime soon... 
Some random guy came up to me and hugged me. He just wanted to tell me that I was gorgeous and that I should go get me a girl and a guy and he would gladly take my leftovers.
...leftovers, take my leftovers, who the fuck says that shit?
drunk gay guys I guess...you know what the best part of gay clubs is? Seeing people you went to high school with. They always panic.
I was so drunk I danced in the cage. With the pole. Gave all my friends quite the panty shot. I started not to wear any but the fishnets were itchy...
I'm going to stop talking now...
...and you guys are never allowed to repeat that last part.
Some random guy came up to me and hugged me. He just wanted to tell me that I was gorgeous and that I should go get me a girl and a guy and he would gladly take my leftovers.
...leftovers, take my leftovers, who the fuck says that shit?
drunk gay guys I guess...you know what the best part of gay clubs is? Seeing people you went to high school with. They always panic.
I was so drunk I danced in the cage. With the pole. Gave all my friends quite the panty shot. I started not to wear any but the fishnets were itchy...
I'm going to stop talking now...
...and you guys are never allowed to repeat that last part.
up waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too late and am now watching a dog show on animal planet and trying to muster up the strength to fix me some food.....
did you get on that pole? i think girls that can do that pole dancing shit are the greatest....
okay. i'm back to the couch to recuperate.