They say it’s on me. That’s a lot of pressure. How can I be happy knowing that the fate of my happiness is in my own hands?
They act like it’s a decision. All I have to do is choose to be happy. It’s so easy, right?
Then why can’t I just do it? I’m grateful and humble. I’m forgiving and kind. I’m loving and empathetic. I’m doing everything right, but I just can’t seem to be... happy.
I think I was once. But now I’m not sure. Maybe being happy is more of a concept. Like being in love. Maybe you just know when you are. Maybe it just feels right. Maybe... there’s too many maybes. Maybe removing the maybe is what happiness is. Happiness, then, is certain. And that means I have never been happy.
I’m not giving up on it though. Again, like love. It only has to happen once to be worth it. Even if it takes a lifetime, it is a journey worth taking.
