trouble_

Someone has been reading my blog.
And yeah, yer probably gonna read this too, I don't care.
He's been going on SG, searching me up to read my blogs.
Yes I feel stalked.
Yes I know you'll read this and I don't fucking care.
I don't want to feel stalked.
I don't want to feel pressured.
I'm not ready for this.
I don't want to hurt you again.
But you chose to stalk me and read my fucking blog,
and I'm not gonna lie just because you may come across it again.
I don't know what I'm doing.
I don't know if this is what I want.
I need my space now.
Is it wrong for me to be happy that you will be out of montreal for awhile?
Is it wrong for me to need this time to think?
I just want to be me,
and being alone, I've felt more like me than every before.
I can't take you forcing your values on me,
I can't take you telling me what I should and shouldn't do.
I have my life, and I like the way I'm living it.
Since you, I've always sworn that whoever I decided to go out with,
would have to accept all the shit I do, and get over it.
Or else it is not worth it.
I like what I do.
I like being me.
And just because you're jealous,
does not mean I should stop.
The one who ends up with me in the end is going to have to accept,
and understand,
and shut the fuck up.
I'm too busy with my own stuff, and school, and just finally doing what I want for a change.
I can't handle this.
I thought it would be fine.
Now I just don't think that anymore.
Now I realize that maybe, just maybe...
I guess that is just as far as I can take it right now.