well the first time I saw heaven
you stood in my doorway
scent of gardenia and lily
by your voice I was admitted
to a forest of cherry
and when you lay down beside me, so softly you did sing
you'll always be my baby
my baby, my baby yeah
you'll always be my baby,
my baby, my love
well you sure got some funny
sense of forever
Always did end with the summer
I awoke up in a bed that's
as wide as a river
and a voice in my head that softly did say
you'll always be my baby
my baby, my baby yeah
you'll always be my baby,
my baby, my love
well six seasons I weathered since
you stood in my doorway
now you're stinking of blood and hard liquor
and you've come for a bier
for your sorry sight to cover
and you've still got the nerve too, softly you say
you owe this to me my baby
my baby, my baby yeah
you owe this to me my baby
my baby, my love
now I don't need no tailor
to sew this suit together
your yarn is a worn out old tether
you'd better button that collar
for your going out to pasture
and I'll be counting the bounty when slowly I'll sing
you owe this to me my baby
my baby, my baby yeah
you owe this to me my baby
my baby, my love
-You'll Always Be by Oh, Susanna
Ok, yes, a lyric which takes up my entire journal. It fits my mood perfectly. I make no apologies.
I called my ex K, the one I cut off contact with a few months ago. Fact of the matter is I'll likely always love the guy. You gotta understand, aside from the hopelessly unrequited love I had for Astrid, he has been my One Big Love. I loved him so much I would have given my life to save his.
Up until this year he was trying to get me to move back in with him. It's platonic now though. He adopted a stray cat. He knows that I am incredibly allergic and would never live with him with Sylvester (the cat came with that name).
I think K senses that I have developed feelings for someone else. When I called him just now to see how he was doing, he seemed distant and uncommunicative. I had this weird feeling of rejection (which I'm totally not entitled to), worry and loss. He's been consistently baring his heart to me. Up until recently, I've been receiving the attention, saying I no longer wanted to be with him but allowing him to express his affection.
I've been thinking that the kinder thing is to be brutal. If I really care about him, I'll be cruel so that he moves on. I do want him to find another. I do want him to have kids. He really wants those.
Then, if you love someone how the hell can you intentionally hurt them? It's a mess. The heart is an accursed thing.
you stood in my doorway
scent of gardenia and lily
by your voice I was admitted
to a forest of cherry
and when you lay down beside me, so softly you did sing
you'll always be my baby
my baby, my baby yeah
you'll always be my baby,
my baby, my love
well you sure got some funny
sense of forever
Always did end with the summer
I awoke up in a bed that's
as wide as a river
and a voice in my head that softly did say
you'll always be my baby
my baby, my baby yeah
you'll always be my baby,
my baby, my love
well six seasons I weathered since
you stood in my doorway
now you're stinking of blood and hard liquor
and you've come for a bier
for your sorry sight to cover
and you've still got the nerve too, softly you say
you owe this to me my baby
my baby, my baby yeah
you owe this to me my baby
my baby, my love
now I don't need no tailor
to sew this suit together
your yarn is a worn out old tether
you'd better button that collar
for your going out to pasture
and I'll be counting the bounty when slowly I'll sing
you owe this to me my baby
my baby, my baby yeah
you owe this to me my baby
my baby, my love
-You'll Always Be by Oh, Susanna
Ok, yes, a lyric which takes up my entire journal. It fits my mood perfectly. I make no apologies.
I called my ex K, the one I cut off contact with a few months ago. Fact of the matter is I'll likely always love the guy. You gotta understand, aside from the hopelessly unrequited love I had for Astrid, he has been my One Big Love. I loved him so much I would have given my life to save his.
Up until this year he was trying to get me to move back in with him. It's platonic now though. He adopted a stray cat. He knows that I am incredibly allergic and would never live with him with Sylvester (the cat came with that name).
I think K senses that I have developed feelings for someone else. When I called him just now to see how he was doing, he seemed distant and uncommunicative. I had this weird feeling of rejection (which I'm totally not entitled to), worry and loss. He's been consistently baring his heart to me. Up until recently, I've been receiving the attention, saying I no longer wanted to be with him but allowing him to express his affection.
I've been thinking that the kinder thing is to be brutal. If I really care about him, I'll be cruel so that he moves on. I do want him to find another. I do want him to have kids. He really wants those.
Then, if you love someone how the hell can you intentionally hurt them? It's a mess. The heart is an accursed thing.
VIEW 27 of 27 COMMENTS
Bittersweet is the best kind of sweet, anyway.
I don't see as many movies as I'd like, so it's hard for me to lay out recommendations. I saw The Grudge and I thought that was decent, really creepy, and it made the back of my legs tingly; I don't generally check out horror films. My favorite film of the year has probably been End of the Century: The Story of the Ramones; I saw that documentary three times.
Oh, I wholeheartedly agree. Go natural on the ADD approach, first, and then seek meds if need be. Good idea.
There's a reggae song by The Gladiators, goes like: Mon, me say it brutal out deh... Could be the temperature, could be affairs of the heart. Hope you weather the storms.
[Edited on Nov 12, 2004 4:47PM]