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tritone

Saint Paul

Member Since 2004

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Wednesday Sep 02, 2009

Sep 2, 2009
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How the fuck do I manage to be involved in dating drama when I'm single?

Around April, one of my closest friend's boyfriend came to realize that I'm "that Tim," the ex that directly preceded him. He lost his shit and forbade my friend from having contact with me.* She was planning on marrying this guy, so she went along with it, and so for months I lost a good friend and a big chunk of my support network. Over the last couple months we've been talking again despite His Majesty's edict. Now catching up over breakfast at Sunny Side Up is this guilt-inspiring clandestine affair; it's ridiculous. Things hadn't been going well between the two of them; this argument had opened her eyes to a larger pattern of control and emotional abuse in their relationship. So she dumped him a couple weeks ago. Sucks that things didn't work out, but it seemed for the best.

Well, now she's back with him. Two days ago I get a message on my phone from him with such windy flattery and bullshit as "we're all different people now" (no, I'm still the asshole I was six months ago, and I'm betting you are too) and "I'd be HONORED to sit down and talk with you about this, maybe over a beer," which is the olive branch I'd extended to him months ago, that his girlfriend had encouraged and that he had refused.

The funny thing: over the last several months I've tried to be really even-headed, unbiased, and to see things from all sides while acknowledging the huge conflict of interest I have in all of this. Now, suddenly with this all this fake, saccharin nicey-niceness being thrown at me, I just wanna give a fine British punk two finger salute and run. I'm actually angry at all this. This guy nearly cost me a friend, a friend who has cried and pleaded with him over the last few months about this and he's remained unmoved. Now the chips are down, he's holding no hand and finally he's willing to deal? Fuck him. I'm pissed that my friend is getting back together with this guy. He had chances and doesn't deserve another one. I cannot respect him.

This is the sort of drama that can only be found revolving around sex. I'm not getting any out of this though, so fuck it. I don't want to deal with this. I just don't want to lose my friend again, and I don't see how I'm left with any choice in the matter.

*This fucked with my head, because I thought he already knew. This means that the aloofness toward me and the extra affection he paid my friend whenever I was around was just his usual territorial nature. surreal
joker_:
It sucks, but it could be worse.
Sep 2, 2009
suicide_earl:
blackeyed

It's like-it's like- why can't you hang out with guys, you know? Just live with someone of your own sex. Just do what you would do with a women, but with your buddy, you know? Why don't guys just do that?"

Sep 2, 2009

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