tristane

Shit.

I think I am falling for the guy I know I shouldn't be falling for. It is always the same, I always end up leaving the people I should stick to. I can't say I regret my decision as such, I would have felt the same way if it had fallen the other way around. Now I can say that I know what I want to do. I love the air crafts. I'll be applying in Jan for the same education. And I will see him again, next year if nothing else.

I know it's a Swedish thing, but there is this one song I can't get out of my head. It doesn't translate well, there is this strophe that goes;

"Danced next to you.
Wanted to go home at four am
but I stayed until seven
without daring to say more than hi.
You're pretty young
I am older than you
but you're a smoker
so I would say we are plus minus zero.

We're going to die at the same time, you and I."



All of this is true, apart from the smoking bit. He is young, sweet and even though I never - NEVER - fall for younger guys I can't stop thinking that I want to touch him, find out how his skin feels underneath my fingertips...

He has a girlfriend.

Which brings me to the next song, "Some day you will have to be alone".

"You don't know this
but I am waiting for you
Some day you will have to be alone
and I'm waiting for you.
I am biding my time
and it will take time
I haven't said anything yet
but I'm waiting, waiting.

You're not that pretty, but there is something about you
just like coming home
the first time you said hi
it is so logical
everybody gets it but you
You don't have a clue
that I'm thinking of you right now.

Some day you will have to be alone
Some day you will have to be alone"



P.S. I saw a JAS 39 Gripen crash on Thursday. For real. Human pilot error, something about the wheels. Pilot is okay. First bad landing for years, last day on the training period.
What are the odds.