trinityy

it 2am thursday morning and i have never felt better i am happy and content with myself.. i actually got down to sit alone and do some major thinking and sorted everything out in my head. now i am just a lil tired and want to go study but i will probally fall asleep as soon as i get into bed.




so i was suppose to work yesterday but my body refused to let me move when i was standing for no more then 5 mins. everytime i got up i felt dizzy and on the verge of passing out. later on i then got real rick and felt like i was gonna .. i crawled into bed and just curled up in a ball and slept with my cat.
anyways i am feeling a lil better now i am 75% better anyways.
but i am happy and getting healthy just need to move.
i have other things going on in my mind but i am not gonna talk about it here b/c i need to talk about it with someone and hopefully see whats going on.
i am losing friends here left and right. i have ppl thinking i will sleep with them for the hell of it.
i am not one who will have sex with someone for fun. i have to have DEEP feelings about you, as well as care, and love you. i have to have a lot of feelings and emotion for the person.. okay enough about that. i could go on and on about that and link it to so many things but i am not in the mood to get into that. i don't even know why i am talking about this here.. =/
i am strong and i know i am happy inside things just keep surfacing and hit me when i least expect it and i switch moods so easy.. i am sorry
i saw a video for this song (lyrics posted below) and i feel in love with the video mainly b/c i was in a shitty mood but the lyrics hit me...
"Bring Me To Life"
(feat. Paul McCoy)

how can you see into my eyes like open doors
leading you down into my core
where i've become so numb without a soul my spirit sleeping somewhere cold
until you find it there and lead it back home wake me up inside
wake me up inside
call my name and save me from the dark
bid my blood to run
before i come undone
save me from the nothing i've become

now that i know what i'm without
you can't just leave me
breathe into me and make me real
bring me to life

wake me up inside
wake me up inside
call my name and save me from the dark
bid my blood to run
before i come undone
save me from the nothing i've become
bring me to life

frozen inside without your touch without your love darling only you are the life among the dead

all this time i can't believe i couldn't see
kept in the dark but you were there in front of me
i've been sleeping a thousand years it seems
got to open my eyes to everything
without a thought without a voice without a soul
don't let me die here
there must be something more
bring me to life
~evanescence~

well i am off my loves hope all is well!
love
trin


everything will be okay.. i can think of one way ..

okay i am gonna shut the fuck up and go study b/c i need to learn. okay i don't need to i want to. i love doing this photography shit b/c i can do it on my own time and own pace. i can reread the chapters before i don't have to worry about being rushed and i don't have to deal with dumb fucks..

my cell will be working thursday afternoon ..

i need a good b/c i suck and am hating so much b/c i need to get shit worked out.. okay not worked out just need to do some shit...