Listening to Metallica. Reflecting.
I feel like I’m missing something. Like I’ve spent this long time away in a small dark room.
They say “be yourself – nothing else matters”.
I try. Each time I poke out of my small dark room I leave so much of me inside there. I don’t feel lonely because I’m alone. I feel lonely because each day, each week, each year a little more of me is left behind. Each time I wander out, more of me is back in that small dark room.
I feel like a hollow projection sent out to remind everyone I’m still here.
I realized just now that the reason I feel like I’ve spent so much time in there is because I actually have. I remember all the time outside the room and long to feel the whole me standing back in there.
I desperately want to come out of here. All of me. The whole me.
I just don’t know how anymore.
I dub thee unforgiven.