With the recent escalation between the zombie hunters and GoGo's zombie army, I am reminded of a thread on a board which I used to roleplay Vampire: the Masquerade. I shall reproduce it here because the best post in the thread is miscoded and frankly I'm sick of trying to read it like that. I didn't write it. I wish I did.
I present: count.rolecall.fallen. It will be long. It is worth it.
From: mtaggard@anon-remailer.not.an.address
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies mtaggard: richmond_va_cell
The Count rates mtaggard reliability at: 94_excellent_reliability
Bad news, and I hate to be the one to say it. Elijah Marks has been missing for about four days. I know he's _missing_, and not in surveillance, because I was supposed to meet with him four days ago to discuss a case we were working. No one in our cell has seen him at all since Sunday. This is out of character for him at this stage of an investigation and I want to send out a warning to everyone that he may have been compromised, and that we must consider the possibility that he has been sold out by someone else in the Richmond cell. Because of that, we have agreed to request the current Count admins to set our reliability to 0_pending_review until we can sort this out.
We also need to take steps to lock down the Count, and quickly. If Eli was turned... well I don't really want to think about that, but if he was then it's only a matter of time before he goes rabid. You know the drill.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: re: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies takerm: new_york_ny_cell
The Count rates takerm reliability at: 88_very_high_reliability
Holy shit. Please tell me you're joking.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies mtaggard: richmond_va_cell
The Count rates mtaggard reliability at: 94_excellent_reliability
On 16 Nov 2000, takerm@anon-remailer.not.an.address writes:
>Holy shit. Please tell me you're joking.
Wish I was. We can't find him. I have new news, too. Phil stopped by his apartment -- Eli gave him a key. The entire place was trashed, top to bottom. Someone was definately looking for something. Doesn't look like he packed, though.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: re: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies admin1: systems_admin
The Count rates admin1 reliability at: 100_admin
I have set all Richmond cell accounts to 0_pending_review until this mess gets sorted out. I have contacted the other admins and we'll be moving the Count pretty soon.
I don't want to do it, but we've got to take a worst-case scenario approach. Elijah was one of the guys who created the Count in the first place, and if they got to him then we're all in big trouble. I've suspended his account and we're sniffing for any attempts to access it. Hope he didn't have a backdoor.
All that said, this sucks. I sort of expected him to live forever or something.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: re: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies takerm: new_york_ny_cell
The Count rates takerm reliability at: 88_very_high_reliability
Ok I believe you. >
How are we going to figure out if someone in the Richmond cell is responsible? An internal investigation isn't going to carry much weight on the list if all of their accounts have been zeroed.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies mtaggard: richmond_va_cell
The Count rates mtaggard reliability at: 0_pending_review
On 16 Nov 2000, takerm@anon-remailer.not.an.address writes:
>Ok I believe you. >: ( How are we going
>to figure out if someone in the Richmond
>cell is responsible? An internal
>investigation isn't going to carry much
>weight on the list if all of their
>accounts have been zeroed.
Good point. Is mgarrett available to come down for an evaluation? He's the closest guy geographically with a top-level reliability, which I think we need in this situation. If he could make it down and look into this mess. We need to make sure that one of us hasn't been ghouled.
It's pretty tense in Richmond right now. We all tend to believe that it was an outside job, but we can't rule out one of us has been ghouled. We _want_ to rule it out, but you know... "paranoia shall be the virtue of our profession."
Damn, I just had a thought. holyman, can you come up? if any of us are ghouled, you'll be able to figure it out in about a second and a half.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: re: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies bader: los_angeles_ca_cell
The Count rates bader reliability at: 72_trusted
re. paranoia shall be the virtue of our profession
Found that old post, thought it might be relevant... taken from count.hunting.tactics
>From: emarks@anon-remailer.not.an.address
>To: count.hunting.tactics
>D ate: 3 Jan 2000
>Subject: re: hope for the new year
>The Count identifies emarks:
>richmond_va_cell
>The Count rates emarks reliability at:
>99_highest_reliability
>Look, I don't want to get anyone down, but we need
>to keep realistic about what we're doing, or we're
>all going to wind up dead.
>Not to kill anyone's party, but I've seen too many
>people feel good about their job, think they're
>starting to make a difference in the world, and
>then disappear overnight -- or worse.
>You need to keep in mind that these things have
>been around for thousands of years, and have
>managed to keep what they do absolutely secret. And
>that they know more about us than we ever will
>about them. And that they have a lot of powerful
>people in their pocket, as near as I can tell, so
>we're out on a limb and someone is trying to SAW
>IT OFF.
>I'm not saying DON'T feel good about what you do.
>I'm not saying lose hope either. If you lose hope,
>you're gonna die.
>I _am_ saying to keep the odds in mind. Never
>forget you are playing against the house, and the
>house always wins. Paranoia must be the virtue of
>our profession.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies mtaggard: richmond_va_cell
The Count rates mtaggard reliability at: 0_pending_review
admin1, thanks for zeroing the accounts.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: re: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies holyman: atlanta_ga_cell
The Count rates holyman reliability at: 90_excellent_reliability
I'll be there as soon as I can leave. I'm bringing Sara with me... hope you're not offended, but I'd feel safer that way. Sad
Sad that its come to this. I pray we get past it.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: re: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies abner: london_uk_cell
The Count rates abner reliability at: 15_new_account
Who is Elijah Marks?
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: re: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies mgarret: new_york_ny_cell
The Count rates mgarrett reliability at: 99_highest_reliability
I'm leaving now. Be there in 7 or 8 hrs, shorter if I drive faster. Which I'm going to do. Meet you at 3rd street diner?
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: re: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies cafeld: boulder_co_cell
The Count rates cafeld reliability at: 70_trusted
bader, thanks for that post.
I've told the Boulder cell. Some of them didn't really know him, but a few of us are really bummed. Look, I hate to bring this up, but do we know if he's been turned into one of them? We gotta think about that.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: re: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies admin1: systems_admin
The Count rates admin1 reliability at: 100_admin
On 16 Nov 2000, abner@anon-remailer.not.an.address writes:
>Who is Elijah Marks?
I hate to do this, and abner please don't take this the wrong way, but I'm locking out all accounts lower than a 70 reliability from participating in this specific thread, except for the Richmond cell which needs to stay involved, we just need to -- you know. Be aware.
Again, it's nothing against you personally, but we need the old school to deal with this. I will create a new discussion thread explaining who Elijah Marks is and open it up for general comments.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies caracas: seattle_wa_cell
The Count rates rcaracas reliability at: 92_excellent_reliability
Been a while.
And this is _not_ how I wanted to sing Reunited.
Ok, I'm not going to go into how much I hate cyberspace hand holding---with your permission I'm coming down there.
Without it, I'll come down without you knowing when or how.
A fresh and less recognizable face might do some good in the poking around areas of Richmond.
And cafeld? I understand what you're saying, but there's no way Eli's been turned. No way on God's earth _or_ Satan's hell.
He'd die first.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies epholst: washington_dc_cell
The Count rates epholst reliability at: 78_trusted
What??? whoa, whoa, let's not go crazy. There could be a perfectly logical explanation why he's not there. I think we're all rushing to conclusions here...
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: re: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies cafeld: boulder_co_cell
The Count rates cafeld reliability at: 70_trusted
On 16 Nov 2000, epholst@anon-remailer.not.an.address writes:
>What??? whoa, whoa, let's not go
>crazy. There could be a perfectly
>logical explanation why he's not
>there. I think we're all rushing to
>conclusions here...
eph, I don't think anyone is rushing to conclusions. Read back through the thread. mtaggard said that they were in the middle of an investigation, and that they haven't spoken with Eli in four days? And that someone went through his apartment? That's not rushing to conclusions, that's assuming the worst, and that's a good idea. mattagard, has Eli ever wandered away during an investigation before?
And caracas, I don't know that we should just assume that Eli would never be turned. That's what I'd want to believe too, but check through the Count dbase... look up "Subject 17." S17 was a NY hunter who got turned. This paragraph is what struck me:
>He claimed that right up until the
>last minute, he had resigned himself
>to death rather than allow himself to
>become his worst enemy... but at the
>last minute, he found himself
>overcome with an overwhelming fear
>of death and a desire not to die, and
>then it seemed as though an alternative
>were provided. Half-mad with
>desperation, he chose vamprism...
And then this one:
>In final refelction we're certain he
>was telling the truth, as we were
>working with a woman who was
>blessed by faith, and could detect
>falsehood with uncanny accuracy.
We don't know what happens during this thing. Hope to God I never find out, but my point is, we don't really know if Eli would have a choice in the matter. Do we?
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies buhan: pierre_nd_cell
The Count rates buhan reliability at: 79_trusted
On 16 Nov 2000, cafeld@anon-remailer.not.an.address writes:
>look up "Subject 17." S17 was
>a NY hunter who got turned.
>This paragraph is what struck me:
[snip S17 summary]
I went and looked up the whole entry. cafeld, it's only rated at 55. Now that doesn't make it a lie, but the _reason_ it was only rated 55, at least the consensus in the discussion forum, is that it's too arbitrary. Yes, that's how it worked for S17, but there was no way to tell if that was how it always is, or if it was just how HE reacted to it.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies buhan: pierre_nd_cell
The Count rates buhan reliability at: 79_trusted
And another thing: I actually *knew* S17, worked in NY for a few months and worked with him pretty closely on a hunt. He wasn't a bad guy, but he was a really different person than Eli. This is not a knock against S17 but he wouldn't have the mindset to deal with a situation like that. He was, you know, a pretty nice, sincere guy who was making the best out of a bad situation. Eli was a lot more ruthless and familiar with the idea of dieing. He always said it was going to happen to him eventually, that the law of averages was going to kick in eventually. I don't think he'd be so terrified of it, esp. given the alternative.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies martho: chicago_il_cell
The Count rates martho reliability at: 87_excellent_reliability
buhan, it's the fact that Eli _was_ ruthless that makes me wonder. If you had the chance to come back as a vampire, would you? I mean, we all KNOW that eventually you go mad, but isn't there a part of you that thinks you could beat it? I'm willing to bet Eli would think he could beat it, and then turn the fight against the people who did it to him.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 17 Nov 2000
Subject: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies shtumpki: las_vegas_nv_cell
The Count rates shtumpki reliability at: 74_trusted
On 16 Nov 2000, buhan@anon-remailer.not.an.address writes:
>Eli was a lot more ruthless and
>familiar with the idea of dieing.
Holy cow, I don't BELIEVE this. This guy might be dead or worse, and you all are SLAGGING him? C'mon! He was out there on the front lines just like the rest of us, and you're painting him as if he wore a black hat and twirled his mustache as he tied young ladies to the railroad tracks or something. Can we PLEASE KEEP SOME PERSPECTIVE HERE? This is NOT the time to be insulting someone who can't even DEFEND THEMSELVES.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 17 Nov 2000
Subject: re: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies mgarrett: new_york_ny_cell
The Count rates mgarrett reliability at: 99_highest_reliability
Made it into Richmond without any problems. Forgot VA banned radar detectors until I hit Fredericksburg, but no one pulled me over so no problem.
Richmond cell was at 3rd street waiting... as were Ephriam and Sara. I see caracas is coming? Good to know. We'll wait for him at the airport.
It seems a little tense on the Count. Everyone calm down and start planning how to deal with it if the worst happens. Gotta say, I don't know if I agree with caracas -- I don't know what Eli would do... don't know what I would do. I _do_ know that if he _is_ a vamp... well, remember, they all go rabid. Every single one, Ben's claims notwithstanding.
shtumpki, for God's sake calm down. "Ruthless" is not an insult in this line of work. Neither is "cold blooded" which is another word I'd use when describing Eli. Don't get me wrong -- I like him. I just think I really don't want him being a vampire.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 17 Nov 2000
Subject: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies caracas: seattle_wa_cell
The Count rates rcaracas reliability at: 92_excellent_reliability
>buhan, it's the fact that Eli _was_
>ruthless that makes me wonder.
>If you had the chance to come
>back as a vampire, would you?
>I mean, we all KNOW that
>eventually you go mad, but isn't
>there a part of you that thinks you
>could beat it? I'm willing to bet
>Eli would think he could beat it,
>and then turn the fight against
>the people who did it to him.
With all due respect, that's like those people who think God will call his elect home "but keeps me behind so I can help the non-believers through the destruction of mankind." That's contradictory idealism conjured up by those guys who _think_ they can have it both ways_
We're here to take them out NOW. Don't you think Eli would've already THOUGHT about the whole 'inside track' scenario? Don't you think it would've 'passed through his mind' when he saw his WIFE turned? Think about the logic behind it_why risk everything, throwing your whole life away, if you thought there was a remote chance turning wasn't a one-way ticket? If you thought you could sacrifice your humanity 'but still be me.' Get some perspective man. The whole point is to prevent these things from destroying who we are, who we love. If we develop a fantasy 'contingency plan' of "If I'm turned, I'll just subvert them" we're already halfway in the grave. You want a "pre-nuptial agreement", you'd better not marry yourself to this profession, because there's no back door.
Eli's been there, face to face, and SEEN FIRSTHAND how it corrupts the mind and soul.
This isn't some comic book fantasy about the guy who fights his way out of hell.
For Eli, there is no best case scenario of being turned.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 17 Nov 2000
Subject: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies martho: chicago_il_cell
The Count rates martho reliability at: 87_excellent_reliability
No, I'm not saying Eli was marching around _trying_ to get turned... I'm suggesting that if he was captured, and they attempted to turn him... would he be tempted to let it happen, thinking he could remain in control? I agree... Eli would NEVER try and court vamprism. I wasn't trying to imply that, and if I did I'm sorry. That's stupid. But if it were foisted on him... heck, I don't even know how it works. count.intel.332 (R73) suggests it doesn't always work.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 17 Nov 2000
Subject: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies phmar: richmond_va_cell
The Count rates phmar reliability at: 0_pending_review
Side update: Matthew, Ephiram and Sara have gone to the airport to get Ramon. The rest of us are back in Taggard's house, just sitting it out. We're pretty sure at this point that we're all on the level, but we have no proof -- only instinct -- so we're waiting for Ephiram to do his thing and prove that we're not, uh... you know. influenced...
Things were pretty tense here a few hours ago. I almost got into it with Taggard, which was pretty rotten of me. Nevermind.
At any rate, don't believe me now (wait till my reliability is restored) BUT, I worked with Eli a fair amount the last year and a half. He's kind of driven. And yes, he is cold blooded. When he was on surveillance for one particularly nasty vamp, he watched this thing feed on fifteen separate targets -- four died -- before setting up the kill. Turns out it was a picky eater, and Eli was able to figure out what it was looking for. It was the "serial killer" the RPD was hunting for. At any rate, even when he could tell one of them was going to die, he didn't intervene. That's pretty cold blooded folks. That said, if he hadn't done that we probably would have died trying to kill it, becuase he was able to figure out most of what it could do.
Do I think Eli could be turned? Well, he'd never seek it out, that's for damn sure. He doesn't have a hero complex. Still... if he thought that by submitting to it he could gain a tactical advantage and get off one last shot before going rabid... yeah, I think if it came down to that or LOSING the advantage he wouldn't hesitate.
Which is stupid. We all know it's stupid. But I could see it.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 17 Nov 2000
Subject: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies mtaggard: richmond_va_cell
The Count rates mtaggard reliability at: 0_pending_review
On 16 Nov 2000, cafeld@anon-remailer.not.an.address writes:
>mattagard, has Eli ever wandered
>away during an investigation before?
HELL NO.
He's disappeared for long periods of time -- but he's always told us that's what he was doing. He'd say "going on surveilance. See you in a bit."
And we've been checking in with each other alot lately -- there's a lot of evidence that doesn't directly point towards but still suggests that the Mayor is a ghoul. That's pretty bad news, and we were trying to figure out what to do with it.
So it's completely and 100% against type for him to just disappear for 4 days without checking in. The very BEST scenario in my opinion is that he's held captive somewhere.
The thing is, I don't know that I buy all this talk about Eli becoming a vamp. Why the hell would a vampire even want to _try_ turning him? I mean, from their perspective... Eli has brought down more of 'em than the rest of us. Why would they want him anything other than dead? Unless they were going to torture him for information, which is something I have worried about.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 18 Nov 2000
Subject: Richmond Cell Cleared
The Count identifies mgarrett: new_york_ny_cell
The Count rates mgarrett reliability at: 99_highest_reliability
We're tired. Good news and bad news.
Good news: all Richmond guys check out, according to Ephriam which is good enough for me. I suggest we reset the Richmond cell ratings. Ephriam and Caracas will back me up on this. So basically, it doesn't look like an inside job.
Bad news: still no sign of Eli. Don't know what to think. I know he has friends on the police force down here, he's worked with them before. I know one or two names, and they're sort of talking around the topic. Like they're trying to tell me they can't talk about it, and the fact that they can't talk about it means that something really bad happened, but they can't talk about it. One guy sounded really scared.
I know a DC cop who Eli worked with who was "in the know," you know what I mean, but he won't do any good down here.
So admin, please reset the Richmond cell accounts to their original ratings, thanks.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 18 Nov 2000
Subject: re: Richmond Cell Cleared
The Count identifies admin1: systems_admin
The Count rates admin1 reliability at: 100_admin
It's all set. As soon as I get independent verification from caracas and holyman, they will be reset to their original ratings. Glad to see you all are still on the straight and narrow.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 18 Nov 2000
Subject: re: Richmond Cell Cleared
The Count identifies epholst: washington_dc_cell
The Count rates epholst reliability at: 78_trusted
Hey mgarret, I know the DC cop you were talking about. He and Eli were looking into something weird around the Smithsonian a while back... I don't know the details. I do have his phone #, though, so I'll give him a call and ask him what he knows about the Richmond PD. It's a long shot, but he might know something.
At this point I don't think it can hurt.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 18 Nov 2000
Subject: "At this point I don't think it can hurt."
The Count identifies martho: chicago_il_cell
The Count rates martho reliability at: 87_excellent_reliability
DON'T say things like that. Just DON'T.
At this point, we don't NEED people doing anything that pops into their head because they think "At this point I don't think it can hurt." That's EXACTLY what will screw everything up the folks in Richmond are trying to take care of.
No offense epholst, and I actually think you should follow up with that cop, but from hereon out let's let the Richmond folks do their thing, and jump in only when they ask.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 18 Nov 2000
Subject: My apparent demise
The Count identifies emarksrip: richmond_va_cell
The Count rates emarksrip reliability at: 99_highest_reliability
The Count flags emarksrip as: backup account (activated, deleted)
Well, if anyone is actually reading this message... then I'm probably dead.
You might be wondering how you're reading this. I suspect that by now (seven days since I haven't checked in) my disappearance has been reported and all my primary accounts have been suspended. If they haven't, you guys need to get off your collective asses and do that, because I know I'm a cold-blooded SOB but I'm not immune to torture. At least, I don't think I am.
At any rate, you're reading this because I helped design the Count, and therefore I get to do all kinds of nasty things like putting in backdoors. I know -- it's cheating. Too bad.
It is currently March 5, 1998. We've just finished working with Lazarus on that thing beneath Richmond. You'll be able to read about it in count.hunting.cases in a bit. At any rate, those of you who participated in it will understand when I tell you that I'm a little drunk right now.
Ok, more than a little.
At any rate, in this altered state I find I need to get a few things off my chest. I had to put a guy down. ccbeddoes was a ghoul, which we didn't know until almost too late, and as it turns out it wasn't even really his fault. I mean, I looked into it... in hindsight he was trying to tell us what was going on, but he really couldn't. Poor bastard.
I had to kill him. It's probably the coldest thing I've done in a long time. God help me, he deserved better than that. Anyone who speaks ill of that man is missing the point -- he was a good hunter for longer than most of you will manage to stay alive. And part of me really believes that he was still that guy, a piece of him, and that piece of him understood what I did.
And I'm drinking to get the other part of me to shut the hell up.
But that's not important. What's important right now is that I'm wondering what's going to happen when I buy it... because it's gotta happen soon. I mean, I started doing this in what, 88? Ten years now? We know most of us last a year (although with the Count I hope to push that average higher) and I don't know what kind of borrowed time I'm on and right now, being drunk, I'm sort of obsessing over that so this is sort of a good-bye letter to you all in case it happens.
If I'm lucky, I just die, I get buried, and my story is told for ages to inspire the new recruits. :-) Eh, or at the very least, I live long enough to help give the independents something to work with that the vampires can't take away, so we can actually start learning from our mistakes and hurting them more.
If I'm not lucky, I get captured, tortured for information, and killed. In which case we better hope that this backdoor I'm using really does go away like I think I've set it up to do, and we better hope the distribution fo the Count is scattered enough to keep anyone from getting in who shouldn't be, even if they've pumped one of the creators full of truth serum, or whatever the hell they do.
If I'm screwed, then they did me and I'm a vampire.
Don't be shocked -- you need to consider that possibility, even if it's unlikely. If you're not willing to consider it, then you're too sentimental to be any good at this job. I know there's gonna be a few of you who say "Eli would never do that!" and you need to shut the hell up and let the rest of the group think about this for a bit.
I don't personally think it's going to happen. We all know they go rabid, we all know there's no way to stop it, and I don't want that -- then again, I never thought cc would be a ghoul either. I don't know how it could happen. Would I be tortured first, out of my mind, and not really thinking clearly when it's done? Would I be pumped full of drugs and ordered to accept it? Or mind controlled? Or maybe I'll just chicken out and convince myself that I can hold on long enough, to beat the odds to take a few more with me. Thing is, I can see myself doing that sometimes. It scares me. I know it happens to people you don't expect.
I'm rambling. I'm drunk. But I do have a point to make:
If you're reading this, then I'm very likely dead -- and if that's true, you need to expect the worst, because if you don't it'll hurt the Count, and we can't afford that. So even if you don't think it would ever happen to me, you need to assume that I've been turned into a vampire. Until you find my body and have it cremated, assume I'm a vampire. And for God's sake, assume I'm a SMART vampire... one who knows all about you guys. And hunt me, and if you get a chance to kill me, do it RIGHT THEN. Don't hesitate for a second and reflect on the good times we had, and how I used to be one of the good guys... and for GOD's SAKE, don't try to "trap" me so you can preach to me about how I've fallen from the light and need to be destroyed because I'm a creature of darkness. Chances are I'll already know that because I'LL BE A VAMPIRE.
Some of you talk too much when you're working. It's a flaw, I've complained about it before, I won't get into it again. But assume the worst, and hunt me without any mercy whatsoever. It's the biggest favor you'll ever do for me.
But I have one more request.
After I'm dead for good, I hope, God I hope that you'll remember all the other stuff more than that. What I mean is, I hope you can separate the man from the monster and think of me, you know, as the guy who believed we were more than food. People are gonna start slagging cc now, and he doesn't deserve it. He did more than just get trapped by the bad guys. He saved our lives plenty of times before he screwed up and they got him. That's got to count for a lot, and right now listening to some of the other guys it doesn't seem like it does. That pisses me off, a lot. It is inevitable that each one of us fails. None of us (not the front-liners, anyway) have a right to expect to live to see old age. We're just not that good. And I hope when each of you goes, you're not thought of as the guy who screwed up and then got killed. Unless you try and do something stupid like make a speech before staking your target, then you deserve everything you get.
I shouldn't do this drunk. On the other hand, I'll never, ever do it sober, so this is the best chance I have. Sorry. I know you guys are reading this thinking there's no way in hell it can be Eli Marks.
I know I come off as sort of a bastard sometimes, but I got tell you something. The Count is the best thing I ever did, and it's because you guys actually get it. You know, the one thing that vampires seem to have going against them -- the only thing, as far as I can understand -- is that they think hunters are stupid. They see us as either ignorant backwater nits or, well, or as the Society of Leopold which is pretty much the same thing, only with a collar and a frock. And our great advantage is that we aren't stupid. Not a one of you on this list is an idiot, regardless of what I claim when we're arguing about something. Of course, we don't want to let them know this, because as long as they think we're incompetent, we win more.
I don't know where I'm going with this.
It sucks to be dead. I mean, it will suck to be dead when I am dead. At least, from where I'm sitting now. I mean... forget it.
It was a pleasure fighting with you.
Elijah Robert Marks
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 19 Nov 2000
Subject: re: My Apparent Demise
The Count identifies caracas: seattle_wa_cell
The Count rates caracas reliability at: 92_excellent_reliability
Unorthodox message. I know, bad forum, but we might not have this sys much longer so you don't like it put me on KP.
Landing in an hour.
I'm at 32,000 looking at a thunderstorm right now. Column goes on all the way up to about 45 and flattens out.
Lightning laddering up and down like a Tesla coil. We're skirting north at about a half mile, so she pretty much disappears up and out of view.
Down at around 20 there's a carpet. Can't see any of the Dallas lights, just more lightning scattering out from the base of the nimbus.
All those synapses firing back and forth, ideas funneling into creation and back, jumping on up into space and back down to spread out across the surface of what looks like God's brain.
There's no room for any of this here.
No room for this. Not meant to be.
I'm going on his word. No choice. Pray God understands, pray with all my heart Eli made it home. Been praying last week, been praying last 8 hours of this trip. Been praying last hour since I read this thing.
I hate this world sometimes.
And I hate that I've got to believe what he wrote here.
Not fair, man. Just not fair. Used to that though.
I pray God understands that I'm done asking questions.
Like I said, I'm landing in an hour. Get someone to meet me.
Bring friends.
Bring Sig. Bring Browning. Bring Colt.
Bring them all.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 19 Nov 2000
Subject: re: Richmond Cell Cleared
The Count identifies holyman: atlanta_ga_cell
The Count rates holyman reliability at: 90_excellent_reliability
Just posting to back up Matthew's assessment. I believe everyone in the Richmond cell checks out ok. Sara, Matthew and I are going to the airport to pick up caracas, and well brief him on our findings. If he agrees, he'll post. If he doesn't agree, well, he's probably post. Smile
We're leaving now.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 19 Nov 2000
Subject: Richmond.
The Count identifies caracas: seattle_wa_cell
The Count rates caracas reliability at: 92_excellent_reliability
Richmond's good.
For what it's worth.
Because nothing is safe, if you know what I mean.
Let's do this.
--Ps. 89:23--
I present: count.rolecall.fallen. It will be long. It is worth it.
From: mtaggard@anon-remailer.not.an.address
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies mtaggard: richmond_va_cell
The Count rates mtaggard reliability at: 94_excellent_reliability
Bad news, and I hate to be the one to say it. Elijah Marks has been missing for about four days. I know he's _missing_, and not in surveillance, because I was supposed to meet with him four days ago to discuss a case we were working. No one in our cell has seen him at all since Sunday. This is out of character for him at this stage of an investigation and I want to send out a warning to everyone that he may have been compromised, and that we must consider the possibility that he has been sold out by someone else in the Richmond cell. Because of that, we have agreed to request the current Count admins to set our reliability to 0_pending_review until we can sort this out.
We also need to take steps to lock down the Count, and quickly. If Eli was turned... well I don't really want to think about that, but if he was then it's only a matter of time before he goes rabid. You know the drill.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: re: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies takerm: new_york_ny_cell
The Count rates takerm reliability at: 88_very_high_reliability
Holy shit. Please tell me you're joking.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies mtaggard: richmond_va_cell
The Count rates mtaggard reliability at: 94_excellent_reliability
On 16 Nov 2000, takerm@anon-remailer.not.an.address writes:
>Holy shit. Please tell me you're joking.
Wish I was. We can't find him. I have new news, too. Phil stopped by his apartment -- Eli gave him a key. The entire place was trashed, top to bottom. Someone was definately looking for something. Doesn't look like he packed, though.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: re: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies admin1: systems_admin
The Count rates admin1 reliability at: 100_admin
I have set all Richmond cell accounts to 0_pending_review until this mess gets sorted out. I have contacted the other admins and we'll be moving the Count pretty soon.
I don't want to do it, but we've got to take a worst-case scenario approach. Elijah was one of the guys who created the Count in the first place, and if they got to him then we're all in big trouble. I've suspended his account and we're sniffing for any attempts to access it. Hope he didn't have a backdoor.
All that said, this sucks. I sort of expected him to live forever or something.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: re: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies takerm: new_york_ny_cell
The Count rates takerm reliability at: 88_very_high_reliability
Ok I believe you. >
How are we going to figure out if someone in the Richmond cell is responsible? An internal investigation isn't going to carry much weight on the list if all of their accounts have been zeroed.To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies mtaggard: richmond_va_cell
The Count rates mtaggard reliability at: 0_pending_review
On 16 Nov 2000, takerm@anon-remailer.not.an.address writes:
>Ok I believe you. >: ( How are we going
>to figure out if someone in the Richmond
>cell is responsible? An internal
>investigation isn't going to carry much
>weight on the list if all of their
>accounts have been zeroed.
Good point. Is mgarrett available to come down for an evaluation? He's the closest guy geographically with a top-level reliability, which I think we need in this situation. If he could make it down and look into this mess. We need to make sure that one of us hasn't been ghouled.
It's pretty tense in Richmond right now. We all tend to believe that it was an outside job, but we can't rule out one of us has been ghouled. We _want_ to rule it out, but you know... "paranoia shall be the virtue of our profession."
Damn, I just had a thought. holyman, can you come up? if any of us are ghouled, you'll be able to figure it out in about a second and a half.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: re: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies bader: los_angeles_ca_cell
The Count rates bader reliability at: 72_trusted
re. paranoia shall be the virtue of our profession
Found that old post, thought it might be relevant... taken from count.hunting.tactics
>From: emarks@anon-remailer.not.an.address
>To: count.hunting.tactics
>D ate: 3 Jan 2000
>Subject: re: hope for the new year
>The Count identifies emarks:
>richmond_va_cell
>The Count rates emarks reliability at:
>99_highest_reliability
>Look, I don't want to get anyone down, but we need
>to keep realistic about what we're doing, or we're
>all going to wind up dead.
>Not to kill anyone's party, but I've seen too many
>people feel good about their job, think they're
>starting to make a difference in the world, and
>then disappear overnight -- or worse.
>You need to keep in mind that these things have
>been around for thousands of years, and have
>managed to keep what they do absolutely secret. And
>that they know more about us than we ever will
>about them. And that they have a lot of powerful
>people in their pocket, as near as I can tell, so
>we're out on a limb and someone is trying to SAW
>IT OFF.
>I'm not saying DON'T feel good about what you do.
>I'm not saying lose hope either. If you lose hope,
>you're gonna die.
>I _am_ saying to keep the odds in mind. Never
>forget you are playing against the house, and the
>house always wins. Paranoia must be the virtue of
>our profession.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies mtaggard: richmond_va_cell
The Count rates mtaggard reliability at: 0_pending_review
admin1, thanks for zeroing the accounts.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: re: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies holyman: atlanta_ga_cell
The Count rates holyman reliability at: 90_excellent_reliability
I'll be there as soon as I can leave. I'm bringing Sara with me... hope you're not offended, but I'd feel safer that way. Sad
Sad that its come to this. I pray we get past it.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: re: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies abner: london_uk_cell
The Count rates abner reliability at: 15_new_account
Who is Elijah Marks?
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: re: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies mgarret: new_york_ny_cell
The Count rates mgarrett reliability at: 99_highest_reliability
I'm leaving now. Be there in 7 or 8 hrs, shorter if I drive faster. Which I'm going to do. Meet you at 3rd street diner?
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: re: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies cafeld: boulder_co_cell
The Count rates cafeld reliability at: 70_trusted
bader, thanks for that post.
I've told the Boulder cell. Some of them didn't really know him, but a few of us are really bummed. Look, I hate to bring this up, but do we know if he's been turned into one of them? We gotta think about that.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: re: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies admin1: systems_admin
The Count rates admin1 reliability at: 100_admin
On 16 Nov 2000, abner@anon-remailer.not.an.address writes:
>Who is Elijah Marks?
I hate to do this, and abner please don't take this the wrong way, but I'm locking out all accounts lower than a 70 reliability from participating in this specific thread, except for the Richmond cell which needs to stay involved, we just need to -- you know. Be aware.
Again, it's nothing against you personally, but we need the old school to deal with this. I will create a new discussion thread explaining who Elijah Marks is and open it up for general comments.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies caracas: seattle_wa_cell
The Count rates rcaracas reliability at: 92_excellent_reliability
Been a while.
And this is _not_ how I wanted to sing Reunited.
Ok, I'm not going to go into how much I hate cyberspace hand holding---with your permission I'm coming down there.
Without it, I'll come down without you knowing when or how.
A fresh and less recognizable face might do some good in the poking around areas of Richmond.
And cafeld? I understand what you're saying, but there's no way Eli's been turned. No way on God's earth _or_ Satan's hell.
He'd die first.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies epholst: washington_dc_cell
The Count rates epholst reliability at: 78_trusted
What??? whoa, whoa, let's not go crazy. There could be a perfectly logical explanation why he's not there. I think we're all rushing to conclusions here...
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: re: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies cafeld: boulder_co_cell
The Count rates cafeld reliability at: 70_trusted
On 16 Nov 2000, epholst@anon-remailer.not.an.address writes:
>What??? whoa, whoa, let's not go
>crazy. There could be a perfectly
>logical explanation why he's not
>there. I think we're all rushing to
>conclusions here...
eph, I don't think anyone is rushing to conclusions. Read back through the thread. mtaggard said that they were in the middle of an investigation, and that they haven't spoken with Eli in four days? And that someone went through his apartment? That's not rushing to conclusions, that's assuming the worst, and that's a good idea. mattagard, has Eli ever wandered away during an investigation before?
And caracas, I don't know that we should just assume that Eli would never be turned. That's what I'd want to believe too, but check through the Count dbase... look up "Subject 17." S17 was a NY hunter who got turned. This paragraph is what struck me:
>He claimed that right up until the
>last minute, he had resigned himself
>to death rather than allow himself to
>become his worst enemy... but at the
>last minute, he found himself
>overcome with an overwhelming fear
>of death and a desire not to die, and
>then it seemed as though an alternative
>were provided. Half-mad with
>desperation, he chose vamprism...
And then this one:
>In final refelction we're certain he
>was telling the truth, as we were
>working with a woman who was
>blessed by faith, and could detect
>falsehood with uncanny accuracy.
We don't know what happens during this thing. Hope to God I never find out, but my point is, we don't really know if Eli would have a choice in the matter. Do we?
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies buhan: pierre_nd_cell
The Count rates buhan reliability at: 79_trusted
On 16 Nov 2000, cafeld@anon-remailer.not.an.address writes:
>look up "Subject 17." S17 was
>a NY hunter who got turned.
>This paragraph is what struck me:
[snip S17 summary]
I went and looked up the whole entry. cafeld, it's only rated at 55. Now that doesn't make it a lie, but the _reason_ it was only rated 55, at least the consensus in the discussion forum, is that it's too arbitrary. Yes, that's how it worked for S17, but there was no way to tell if that was how it always is, or if it was just how HE reacted to it.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies buhan: pierre_nd_cell
The Count rates buhan reliability at: 79_trusted
And another thing: I actually *knew* S17, worked in NY for a few months and worked with him pretty closely on a hunt. He wasn't a bad guy, but he was a really different person than Eli. This is not a knock against S17 but he wouldn't have the mindset to deal with a situation like that. He was, you know, a pretty nice, sincere guy who was making the best out of a bad situation. Eli was a lot more ruthless and familiar with the idea of dieing. He always said it was going to happen to him eventually, that the law of averages was going to kick in eventually. I don't think he'd be so terrified of it, esp. given the alternative.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 16 Nov 2000
Subject: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies martho: chicago_il_cell
The Count rates martho reliability at: 87_excellent_reliability
buhan, it's the fact that Eli _was_ ruthless that makes me wonder. If you had the chance to come back as a vampire, would you? I mean, we all KNOW that eventually you go mad, but isn't there a part of you that thinks you could beat it? I'm willing to bet Eli would think he could beat it, and then turn the fight against the people who did it to him.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 17 Nov 2000
Subject: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies shtumpki: las_vegas_nv_cell
The Count rates shtumpki reliability at: 74_trusted
On 16 Nov 2000, buhan@anon-remailer.not.an.address writes:
>Eli was a lot more ruthless and
>familiar with the idea of dieing.
Holy cow, I don't BELIEVE this. This guy might be dead or worse, and you all are SLAGGING him? C'mon! He was out there on the front lines just like the rest of us, and you're painting him as if he wore a black hat and twirled his mustache as he tied young ladies to the railroad tracks or something. Can we PLEASE KEEP SOME PERSPECTIVE HERE? This is NOT the time to be insulting someone who can't even DEFEND THEMSELVES.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 17 Nov 2000
Subject: re: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies mgarrett: new_york_ny_cell
The Count rates mgarrett reliability at: 99_highest_reliability
Made it into Richmond without any problems. Forgot VA banned radar detectors until I hit Fredericksburg, but no one pulled me over so no problem.
Richmond cell was at 3rd street waiting... as were Ephriam and Sara. I see caracas is coming? Good to know. We'll wait for him at the airport.
It seems a little tense on the Count. Everyone calm down and start planning how to deal with it if the worst happens. Gotta say, I don't know if I agree with caracas -- I don't know what Eli would do... don't know what I would do. I _do_ know that if he _is_ a vamp... well, remember, they all go rabid. Every single one, Ben's claims notwithstanding.
shtumpki, for God's sake calm down. "Ruthless" is not an insult in this line of work. Neither is "cold blooded" which is another word I'd use when describing Eli. Don't get me wrong -- I like him. I just think I really don't want him being a vampire.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 17 Nov 2000
Subject: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies caracas: seattle_wa_cell
The Count rates rcaracas reliability at: 92_excellent_reliability
>buhan, it's the fact that Eli _was_
>ruthless that makes me wonder.
>If you had the chance to come
>back as a vampire, would you?
>I mean, we all KNOW that
>eventually you go mad, but isn't
>there a part of you that thinks you
>could beat it? I'm willing to bet
>Eli would think he could beat it,
>and then turn the fight against
>the people who did it to him.
With all due respect, that's like those people who think God will call his elect home "but keeps me behind so I can help the non-believers through the destruction of mankind." That's contradictory idealism conjured up by those guys who _think_ they can have it both ways_
We're here to take them out NOW. Don't you think Eli would've already THOUGHT about the whole 'inside track' scenario? Don't you think it would've 'passed through his mind' when he saw his WIFE turned? Think about the logic behind it_why risk everything, throwing your whole life away, if you thought there was a remote chance turning wasn't a one-way ticket? If you thought you could sacrifice your humanity 'but still be me.' Get some perspective man. The whole point is to prevent these things from destroying who we are, who we love. If we develop a fantasy 'contingency plan' of "If I'm turned, I'll just subvert them" we're already halfway in the grave. You want a "pre-nuptial agreement", you'd better not marry yourself to this profession, because there's no back door.
Eli's been there, face to face, and SEEN FIRSTHAND how it corrupts the mind and soul.
This isn't some comic book fantasy about the guy who fights his way out of hell.
For Eli, there is no best case scenario of being turned.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 17 Nov 2000
Subject: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies martho: chicago_il_cell
The Count rates martho reliability at: 87_excellent_reliability
No, I'm not saying Eli was marching around _trying_ to get turned... I'm suggesting that if he was captured, and they attempted to turn him... would he be tempted to let it happen, thinking he could remain in control? I agree... Eli would NEVER try and court vamprism. I wasn't trying to imply that, and if I did I'm sorry. That's stupid. But if it were foisted on him... heck, I don't even know how it works. count.intel.332 (R73) suggests it doesn't always work.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 17 Nov 2000
Subject: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies phmar: richmond_va_cell
The Count rates phmar reliability at: 0_pending_review
Side update: Matthew, Ephiram and Sara have gone to the airport to get Ramon. The rest of us are back in Taggard's house, just sitting it out. We're pretty sure at this point that we're all on the level, but we have no proof -- only instinct -- so we're waiting for Ephiram to do his thing and prove that we're not, uh... you know. influenced...
Things were pretty tense here a few hours ago. I almost got into it with Taggard, which was pretty rotten of me. Nevermind.
At any rate, don't believe me now (wait till my reliability is restored) BUT, I worked with Eli a fair amount the last year and a half. He's kind of driven. And yes, he is cold blooded. When he was on surveillance for one particularly nasty vamp, he watched this thing feed on fifteen separate targets -- four died -- before setting up the kill. Turns out it was a picky eater, and Eli was able to figure out what it was looking for. It was the "serial killer" the RPD was hunting for. At any rate, even when he could tell one of them was going to die, he didn't intervene. That's pretty cold blooded folks. That said, if he hadn't done that we probably would have died trying to kill it, becuase he was able to figure out most of what it could do.
Do I think Eli could be turned? Well, he'd never seek it out, that's for damn sure. He doesn't have a hero complex. Still... if he thought that by submitting to it he could gain a tactical advantage and get off one last shot before going rabid... yeah, I think if it came down to that or LOSING the advantage he wouldn't hesitate.
Which is stupid. We all know it's stupid. But I could see it.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 17 Nov 2000
Subject: Elijah missing... dead or worse?
The Count identifies mtaggard: richmond_va_cell
The Count rates mtaggard reliability at: 0_pending_review
On 16 Nov 2000, cafeld@anon-remailer.not.an.address writes:
>mattagard, has Eli ever wandered
>away during an investigation before?
HELL NO.
He's disappeared for long periods of time -- but he's always told us that's what he was doing. He'd say "going on surveilance. See you in a bit."
And we've been checking in with each other alot lately -- there's a lot of evidence that doesn't directly point towards but still suggests that the Mayor is a ghoul. That's pretty bad news, and we were trying to figure out what to do with it.
So it's completely and 100% against type for him to just disappear for 4 days without checking in. The very BEST scenario in my opinion is that he's held captive somewhere.
The thing is, I don't know that I buy all this talk about Eli becoming a vamp. Why the hell would a vampire even want to _try_ turning him? I mean, from their perspective... Eli has brought down more of 'em than the rest of us. Why would they want him anything other than dead? Unless they were going to torture him for information, which is something I have worried about.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 18 Nov 2000
Subject: Richmond Cell Cleared
The Count identifies mgarrett: new_york_ny_cell
The Count rates mgarrett reliability at: 99_highest_reliability
We're tired. Good news and bad news.
Good news: all Richmond guys check out, according to Ephriam which is good enough for me. I suggest we reset the Richmond cell ratings. Ephriam and Caracas will back me up on this. So basically, it doesn't look like an inside job.
Bad news: still no sign of Eli. Don't know what to think. I know he has friends on the police force down here, he's worked with them before. I know one or two names, and they're sort of talking around the topic. Like they're trying to tell me they can't talk about it, and the fact that they can't talk about it means that something really bad happened, but they can't talk about it. One guy sounded really scared.
I know a DC cop who Eli worked with who was "in the know," you know what I mean, but he won't do any good down here.
So admin, please reset the Richmond cell accounts to their original ratings, thanks.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 18 Nov 2000
Subject: re: Richmond Cell Cleared
The Count identifies admin1: systems_admin
The Count rates admin1 reliability at: 100_admin
It's all set. As soon as I get independent verification from caracas and holyman, they will be reset to their original ratings. Glad to see you all are still on the straight and narrow.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 18 Nov 2000
Subject: re: Richmond Cell Cleared
The Count identifies epholst: washington_dc_cell
The Count rates epholst reliability at: 78_trusted
Hey mgarret, I know the DC cop you were talking about. He and Eli were looking into something weird around the Smithsonian a while back... I don't know the details. I do have his phone #, though, so I'll give him a call and ask him what he knows about the Richmond PD. It's a long shot, but he might know something.
At this point I don't think it can hurt.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 18 Nov 2000
Subject: "At this point I don't think it can hurt."
The Count identifies martho: chicago_il_cell
The Count rates martho reliability at: 87_excellent_reliability
DON'T say things like that. Just DON'T.
At this point, we don't NEED people doing anything that pops into their head because they think "At this point I don't think it can hurt." That's EXACTLY what will screw everything up the folks in Richmond are trying to take care of.
No offense epholst, and I actually think you should follow up with that cop, but from hereon out let's let the Richmond folks do their thing, and jump in only when they ask.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 18 Nov 2000
Subject: My apparent demise
The Count identifies emarksrip: richmond_va_cell
The Count rates emarksrip reliability at: 99_highest_reliability
The Count flags emarksrip as: backup account (activated, deleted)
Well, if anyone is actually reading this message... then I'm probably dead.
You might be wondering how you're reading this. I suspect that by now (seven days since I haven't checked in) my disappearance has been reported and all my primary accounts have been suspended. If they haven't, you guys need to get off your collective asses and do that, because I know I'm a cold-blooded SOB but I'm not immune to torture. At least, I don't think I am.
At any rate, you're reading this because I helped design the Count, and therefore I get to do all kinds of nasty things like putting in backdoors. I know -- it's cheating. Too bad.
It is currently March 5, 1998. We've just finished working with Lazarus on that thing beneath Richmond. You'll be able to read about it in count.hunting.cases in a bit. At any rate, those of you who participated in it will understand when I tell you that I'm a little drunk right now.
Ok, more than a little.
At any rate, in this altered state I find I need to get a few things off my chest. I had to put a guy down. ccbeddoes was a ghoul, which we didn't know until almost too late, and as it turns out it wasn't even really his fault. I mean, I looked into it... in hindsight he was trying to tell us what was going on, but he really couldn't. Poor bastard.
I had to kill him. It's probably the coldest thing I've done in a long time. God help me, he deserved better than that. Anyone who speaks ill of that man is missing the point -- he was a good hunter for longer than most of you will manage to stay alive. And part of me really believes that he was still that guy, a piece of him, and that piece of him understood what I did.
And I'm drinking to get the other part of me to shut the hell up.
But that's not important. What's important right now is that I'm wondering what's going to happen when I buy it... because it's gotta happen soon. I mean, I started doing this in what, 88? Ten years now? We know most of us last a year (although with the Count I hope to push that average higher) and I don't know what kind of borrowed time I'm on and right now, being drunk, I'm sort of obsessing over that so this is sort of a good-bye letter to you all in case it happens.
If I'm lucky, I just die, I get buried, and my story is told for ages to inspire the new recruits. :-) Eh, or at the very least, I live long enough to help give the independents something to work with that the vampires can't take away, so we can actually start learning from our mistakes and hurting them more.
If I'm not lucky, I get captured, tortured for information, and killed. In which case we better hope that this backdoor I'm using really does go away like I think I've set it up to do, and we better hope the distribution fo the Count is scattered enough to keep anyone from getting in who shouldn't be, even if they've pumped one of the creators full of truth serum, or whatever the hell they do.
If I'm screwed, then they did me and I'm a vampire.
Don't be shocked -- you need to consider that possibility, even if it's unlikely. If you're not willing to consider it, then you're too sentimental to be any good at this job. I know there's gonna be a few of you who say "Eli would never do that!" and you need to shut the hell up and let the rest of the group think about this for a bit.
I don't personally think it's going to happen. We all know they go rabid, we all know there's no way to stop it, and I don't want that -- then again, I never thought cc would be a ghoul either. I don't know how it could happen. Would I be tortured first, out of my mind, and not really thinking clearly when it's done? Would I be pumped full of drugs and ordered to accept it? Or mind controlled? Or maybe I'll just chicken out and convince myself that I can hold on long enough, to beat the odds to take a few more with me. Thing is, I can see myself doing that sometimes. It scares me. I know it happens to people you don't expect.
I'm rambling. I'm drunk. But I do have a point to make:
If you're reading this, then I'm very likely dead -- and if that's true, you need to expect the worst, because if you don't it'll hurt the Count, and we can't afford that. So even if you don't think it would ever happen to me, you need to assume that I've been turned into a vampire. Until you find my body and have it cremated, assume I'm a vampire. And for God's sake, assume I'm a SMART vampire... one who knows all about you guys. And hunt me, and if you get a chance to kill me, do it RIGHT THEN. Don't hesitate for a second and reflect on the good times we had, and how I used to be one of the good guys... and for GOD's SAKE, don't try to "trap" me so you can preach to me about how I've fallen from the light and need to be destroyed because I'm a creature of darkness. Chances are I'll already know that because I'LL BE A VAMPIRE.
Some of you talk too much when you're working. It's a flaw, I've complained about it before, I won't get into it again. But assume the worst, and hunt me without any mercy whatsoever. It's the biggest favor you'll ever do for me.
But I have one more request.
After I'm dead for good, I hope, God I hope that you'll remember all the other stuff more than that. What I mean is, I hope you can separate the man from the monster and think of me, you know, as the guy who believed we were more than food. People are gonna start slagging cc now, and he doesn't deserve it. He did more than just get trapped by the bad guys. He saved our lives plenty of times before he screwed up and they got him. That's got to count for a lot, and right now listening to some of the other guys it doesn't seem like it does. That pisses me off, a lot. It is inevitable that each one of us fails. None of us (not the front-liners, anyway) have a right to expect to live to see old age. We're just not that good. And I hope when each of you goes, you're not thought of as the guy who screwed up and then got killed. Unless you try and do something stupid like make a speech before staking your target, then you deserve everything you get.
I shouldn't do this drunk. On the other hand, I'll never, ever do it sober, so this is the best chance I have. Sorry. I know you guys are reading this thinking there's no way in hell it can be Eli Marks.
I know I come off as sort of a bastard sometimes, but I got tell you something. The Count is the best thing I ever did, and it's because you guys actually get it. You know, the one thing that vampires seem to have going against them -- the only thing, as far as I can understand -- is that they think hunters are stupid. They see us as either ignorant backwater nits or, well, or as the Society of Leopold which is pretty much the same thing, only with a collar and a frock. And our great advantage is that we aren't stupid. Not a one of you on this list is an idiot, regardless of what I claim when we're arguing about something. Of course, we don't want to let them know this, because as long as they think we're incompetent, we win more.
I don't know where I'm going with this.
It sucks to be dead. I mean, it will suck to be dead when I am dead. At least, from where I'm sitting now. I mean... forget it.
It was a pleasure fighting with you.
Elijah Robert Marks
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 19 Nov 2000
Subject: re: My Apparent Demise
The Count identifies caracas: seattle_wa_cell
The Count rates caracas reliability at: 92_excellent_reliability
Unorthodox message. I know, bad forum, but we might not have this sys much longer so you don't like it put me on KP.
Landing in an hour.
I'm at 32,000 looking at a thunderstorm right now. Column goes on all the way up to about 45 and flattens out.
Lightning laddering up and down like a Tesla coil. We're skirting north at about a half mile, so she pretty much disappears up and out of view.
Down at around 20 there's a carpet. Can't see any of the Dallas lights, just more lightning scattering out from the base of the nimbus.
All those synapses firing back and forth, ideas funneling into creation and back, jumping on up into space and back down to spread out across the surface of what looks like God's brain.
There's no room for any of this here.
No room for this. Not meant to be.
I'm going on his word. No choice. Pray God understands, pray with all my heart Eli made it home. Been praying last week, been praying last 8 hours of this trip. Been praying last hour since I read this thing.
I hate this world sometimes.
And I hate that I've got to believe what he wrote here.
Not fair, man. Just not fair. Used to that though.
I pray God understands that I'm done asking questions.
Like I said, I'm landing in an hour. Get someone to meet me.
Bring friends.
Bring Sig. Bring Browning. Bring Colt.
Bring them all.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 19 Nov 2000
Subject: re: Richmond Cell Cleared
The Count identifies holyman: atlanta_ga_cell
The Count rates holyman reliability at: 90_excellent_reliability
Just posting to back up Matthew's assessment. I believe everyone in the Richmond cell checks out ok. Sara, Matthew and I are going to the airport to pick up caracas, and well brief him on our findings. If he agrees, he'll post. If he doesn't agree, well, he's probably post. Smile
We're leaving now.
To: count.rollcall.fallen
Date: 19 Nov 2000
Subject: Richmond.
The Count identifies caracas: seattle_wa_cell
The Count rates caracas reliability at: 92_excellent_reliability
Richmond's good.
For what it's worth.
Because nothing is safe, if you know what I mean.
Let's do this.
--Ps. 89:23--
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i am using paypal. it should be sent to nimrod.rotem@gmail.com