Im such a fucker. And please forgive what is about to be the most sorry ass feeling sorry for myself journal entry I have ever written!
All I have been doing lately is feeling down on myself and second guessing everything in my life. Outside of my boyfriend and the few people I have met online I really have no friends and no life in real life. The whole F Factor has put such a strain on my relationship this week that I can barely look at bf at all and I dont know why I feel so helpless and insecure why do I feel so blah? I think I have lost all my confidence in myself. I look around and all I see are all these incredibly gorgeous women everywhere. Im too skinny, I look like a 12 year old boy for heavens sake!! I feel like all I have done is let myself go and I dont care how I look anymore. I live in sweats when I am not at work and dont do anything but lay on the couch and watch my Alias DVDs lately.
Did I mention that I QUIT SMOKING WEED??? Not by choice but by lack of fundage for the expensive shit we smoke. And I didnt make the choice, bf chose for both us. It sucks maybe that why I am feeling so depressed. Or maybe because its F Factor day tomorrow thank the heavens for Persya who will be spending the evening with me. Girl u get me through! I heart u!!! BF said he was considering not going tomorrow because we were too busy Saturday and he didnt wanna deal with the hassles of listening to my mouth about the whole F Factor shit. Well thast not what I wanna hear! Tell me u arent going cuz u hate to see me like this right? Oh well right?
SGNY Saturday night - I hope I feel up to making the trek Steelers better win or I am not leaving my house til next season!!
I really just feeling like sitting down and balling my eyes out right now.
Enough of my whining, right??!!
GO STEELERS!!
PRJ
All I have been doing lately is feeling down on myself and second guessing everything in my life. Outside of my boyfriend and the few people I have met online I really have no friends and no life in real life. The whole F Factor has put such a strain on my relationship this week that I can barely look at bf at all and I dont know why I feel so helpless and insecure why do I feel so blah? I think I have lost all my confidence in myself. I look around and all I see are all these incredibly gorgeous women everywhere. Im too skinny, I look like a 12 year old boy for heavens sake!! I feel like all I have done is let myself go and I dont care how I look anymore. I live in sweats when I am not at work and dont do anything but lay on the couch and watch my Alias DVDs lately.
Did I mention that I QUIT SMOKING WEED??? Not by choice but by lack of fundage for the expensive shit we smoke. And I didnt make the choice, bf chose for both us. It sucks maybe that why I am feeling so depressed. Or maybe because its F Factor day tomorrow thank the heavens for Persya who will be spending the evening with me. Girl u get me through! I heart u!!! BF said he was considering not going tomorrow because we were too busy Saturday and he didnt wanna deal with the hassles of listening to my mouth about the whole F Factor shit. Well thast not what I wanna hear! Tell me u arent going cuz u hate to see me like this right? Oh well right?
SGNY Saturday night - I hope I feel up to making the trek Steelers better win or I am not leaving my house til next season!!
I really just feeling like sitting down and balling my eyes out right now.
Enough of my whining, right??!!
GO STEELERS!!
PRJ
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*hugs*
and hope yer feeling better soon
yeah really. cus mike will do it and send tons of journal stalker fanbois like me your way HAH!
hehe
we gave it to you because the kicker sucks.