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toxicroach

Chicago, IL

Member Since 2014

Followers 192 Following 843

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The stress.

Sep 7, 2017
5
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haven't been crazy active on hear and when I am its not really photo stuff. fact is I haven't been doing much photo stuff and its really bumming me out.

my expenses have been going no where but up. so over the last few months I have been having to work around the clock 7 days a week with my day job, in order to save to travel, get a new camera, or just be less stressed. this has not been without setbacks. between 3 of my friends getting married all at once and me having to shell out about a grand between them all (also general sadness about being alone) and getting into a car accident and being stuck at home for 2 weeks (witch with uber means i make no money) and my closest friend of 10 years moving across the country. this stuff and a bunch of other things has me just beyond low. everything I eat makes me sick, I have daily anxiety attacks, and even if i wanted treatment I can not afford it.

after all that crazyness im now broke again and doing any sort of photo work seams just so far way. I have even debated selling the camera equipment I have to pay for food, but every time I think about that, it breaks my heart. then I look at my body of work, and hate everything, then hate it and start debating it again.

fact is I would love to keep doing SG sets but I dont think I can. shooting sets for this site has been so much fun but I look at the work of others and then at mine and there is a difference. I feel that the quality of my work is not up to the levels of the rest of the site and it is not fare to the amazing gals I would be working with. almost all of my sets have under preformed and this of course is my fault. you guys deserve better and until I can provide that I think a break is needed. (plus if i officially say im taking a break i can not be as hurt if I need to sell my gear).

hopefully this is temporary. because being apart and contributing to this community has been really awesome, and I hope to do it again sooner rather than later.

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