Tuesday Feb 04, 2003

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A study released earlier today by researchers at the Institute of Light shows that my dick is bigger than yours. News of this discovery has shocked the four-wheel drive community who originally thought their dick was far superior in size due to the large muffler and engine capacity on their urban off-road vehicles. Shockingly enough, the study actually found the opposite to be true; showing that fast cars and big tires actually have small dicks, despite popular belief. Researches would not comment on the study, except to say- they saw it coming.
lefty:
ted nuget has just released a new cologne, and scientists say that he's tested it on every animal possible...

"we sprayed it on everything" says nuget, "birds, cats, lizards, ducks....and then when we ran out of cologne, we started punching the ducks...."

i heard it on the onion this morning...

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